October 2007 News Archive (Page 2)

Those of you who visit POTP know I don't mind Jessica Simpson at all. I'm kewl with her and her plummeting career and shitty love life. But she jumps on the wrong penises. There was Dane Cook, John Mayer, Owen Wilson. These guys aren't going to wanna commit to her double Ds like Nick Lachey did. But a girl's gotta have fun, I guess.

Jessica Simpson and Owen Wilson were spotted on a date in Los Angeles, according to the new issue of Star magazine.

The two dined Sunday at the Huntley Hotel in Santa Monica before retiring to his Malibu home."He couldn't keep his hands off her," a witness tells the mag.

Apparently, sparks flew between the two Texans when they were in Austin on Oct. 16 to appear in a video with Willie Nelson.

Kate Hudson weirds me out. Then Owen tried to get in Mary Kate's panties, and now Jessica Simpson. Is he currently undergoing therapy? Obviously, some things still need fixin' upstairs.

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Lance Armstrong dumped his wife, dumped Sheryl Crow, and now he's moving on to fish, fish face to be exact.

21-year-old Ashley showed up at Rose Bar on Monday night and made out all night with 36-year-old Lance Armstrong!

"They came together with a group of friends. Ashley drank red wine, sat on his lap and they were making out all night. They left together around 2 a.m."

Awwww... the drunk makeout. It would be romantic if Lance wasn't old enough to be her father, but it's gross and Lance needs to get over his midlife crisis. Ewww.

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It's so far so bad for the poptart.

Commissioner Scott Gordon issued Britney two visits/ week from 12 to 7 p.m. She also will still have one overnight visit. All visits with her boo boos will be monitored. The parenting coach was talkin' shit about Ms. Spears and it worked!

The coach wrote:

"The problem is that unless Ms. Spears realizes the consequences of her behavior and the impact that it has [on] her children, nothing is going to be successful. The environment at the house ranged from chaotic to almost somber with little communication at all."

By Friday, Britney must also submit proof that her pool is child protected. She still has to meet with that assholish parenting coach for two hours every week! And she still has to go to counseling sessions with Federsperm.

Britney asked if she could stop taking mandatory drug tests, but she was also denied!!!

As I said yesterday, Kevin Federline should also be drug tested. This really isn't fair. Hold on, Brit Brit!

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OMG, I'm SOOOOO sorry for posting so late today. Yes, I went to the Regina Spektor concert last night. That bitch is so fierce! She is perfection. Although I think she studied Tori Amos and kind of cops a lot of her style, she's an original and she has one of the best voices I've ever heard live ...

Back to more important things. I went to a lounge afterwards but I didn't even get drunk so I feel like I literally have no excuse for sleeping in as late as I did today, other than the fact that I was up til 2 a.m. the night before working on the site and I've had so many assignments. I've literally been running around like a chicken with its head cut off, so I guess it was time for this ho to get a little rest.

Mad props to Snarky who called me and woke me up. Let's get to it.

Don't ask about the headline, I miss Beavis and Butthead. Random. Anywho, Paris still gets pissed that people promote her infected cooter.

Paris Hilton allegedly threw a tantrum at a Toronto adult store on Wednesday (Oct. 24), demanding the manager take down posters promoting her infamous sex tape, CTV reports. The best part? It was all captured on the store's surveillance tapes.

"You guys can't use my image in a porn store," a woman said to be Hilton was heard saying, according to CTV. "I'm going to call my lawyer and sue the (expletive) out of this place. I really want them down because they're mean and this is not right. I'm really serious, this is disgusting. And I want the other ones too or I'm calling the (expletive) cops."

Adding to the already awesomeness of her tantrum is the fact Hilton was allegedly dressed up for Halloween in a skeleton costume.

Shortly after leaving the store, a man claiming to be Hilton's manager returned and told the staff to keep the incident quite, threatening a lawsuit for defamation of character if the tape of Hilton's meltdown were to be leaked.

Of course, the porn proprietors quickly called up every media outlet they could and are now negotiating for rights to the footage with two U.S. tabloid shows. Offers are said to have reached $50,000.

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* No linkage today. I have class then I gotta go head out to the Regina Spektor concert. Luv her! See ya in the manana, whatever that means. ;)

Britney Spears is furious that ex-hubby Kevin Federline is escaping drug testing while she must submit to random checks.

The troubled star â€" branded a "habitual, frequent and continuous" user of drugs and alcohol by LA judge Scott Jordon â€" had begged the court to hand K-Fed the same treatment.A pal said: "She is furious. She believes the court is more sympathetic towards Kevin."

In this case, Daddy Dude didn't really strike again, but I like that headline. If the courts are trying to determine who's the better parent, both parents should be drug tested, dontcha think? Or maybe that's just my take.

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Amy's husband got mad at his bitch and sold her out, literally.

Lou Bellera sold the rights to "Amy Fisher Caught on Tape" this past spring after he filed for divorce and she began dating one-time flame Joey Buttafuoco."I did it out of the heat of anger and passion," Bellera told The Post.

"We were estranged. She was seeing Joey. I was seething about the whole thing. It just came to a point where I was hurt and embarrassed by it . . . and it pressed the wrong button. I just used that as a vehicle to strike back at her."

The couple reconciled this summer, and Bellera didn't tell Fisher that he'd sold the sex tape to Red Light District Video until this month.

Fisher said she was willing to forgive her husband.

"We've been together for so many years and have had so many ups and downs," she said. ". . . I don't want to see it. It's better for me if I just don't think about it. I'm just going to hide in my house."

Don't make a sex tape people! I'm so going to make a sex tape one day soon.

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Here's Lauren Conrad at a photoshoot for Mark Cosmetics. I know a lot of people think she's pretty, but I can't get over the fact that Lauren looks so much older than she is.I mean, my mom looks younger than this bitch. Okay, maybe my mom doesn't look younger, and that's only because gravity has started to take hold of her tits, but if it wasn't for that, I'd say my mom looks more youthful. The eye wrinkles in your early, early twenties? Maybe it's all a scam by MTV's fake Hills and LC's actually older...

Teri Hatcher's costume is very, uh, interesting. I know Teri's a joker, but it took me a while to figure out what was going on. Too much fug at once slows down my comprehension.

At first I thought it was great that Shia was soakin' up Rihanna's panties with a dinner and strawberries and wine dessert. Then I heard reports that he's a slut. Here goes a new man whore story.

Shia LaBeouf was spotted chain-smoking and "making out with a tall brunette girl" at Les Deux. He also busted some moves to "Umbrella" by Rihanna (to whom he was once linked), the witness said.

"Tons of girls were coming up to his table and introducing themselves, and Shia seemed to love getting recognized," the witness added. "He was in a really good mood and was really nice to everybody who approached him."

The actor was overheard saying, "I'm relatively new to the scene" but was ready "to party" and "chat with ladies."

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