Britney’s A Kinky Sex Fiend
As if we don’t already know enough about Britney’s personal life, we get to find out plenty more and it’s the good stuff, man! Turns out she’s a kinky sex beast with whips, chains, furry handcuffs, mirrored ceilings, paddles and kinky outfits. Dayum! She could open her own sex shop with all that crap! Ewww, I bet she doesn’t thoroughly clean them after use though cause she’s just dirty like that. Ya know why? Because sources say her white couches have dog poo and diaper stains on them. Ewwwww! Oh well, on with the sex stuff!
“She wears Catholic schoolgirl uniforms, a maid’s uniform and a Cinderella outfit,” claims the mole. The source also contends Brit is so obsessed with Marilyn Monroe that she wants her nose redone to look like the blond model of self-destruction.”Britney is sexually obsessed,” the source tells Star.
Perhaps K-Fed knows that; they did make two babies. But his legal team, which scours the tabloid media for new evidence of maternal incompetence, is possibly less familiar with the claim that Brit leaves some of her sex toys out in the living room.When — and if — she regains custody of Sean Preston, 2, and Jayden James, 14 months, Federline may not be tickled about them finding her ticklers.
According to the mag, her “new squeeze” is Michael Marchand, a Hollywood waiter and aspiring actor. But his mom insists that they’re “just friends” who like “watching videos together and playing Scrabble.”
I can’t knock her for having sex toys, paddles, furry handcuffs, spare goats in the closet, kinky outfits and mirrored ceilings because who doesn’t? Geesh, I just built an entire new edition on my home just for my kink den. Just remember Star mag. was the main source of the story so don’t take it too seriously just yet! It’s still some insane stuff though, huh?
Mr. Gyllenhaal says:
She doesn’t have crap on me. My dungeon would put hers to shame!! PLZ, Whips are so eighties. It’s all about the barbed wire now!! My tushy still hurts from being a naughty boy last week!! UH, OH…I just spilt my milk:)!!!
Joy A says:
LMAO!
Kink Den? Dungeon? I don’t got them kind of funds to build rooms and shit, but I’m gonna start saving. Haha.
Shhh says:
My question is, what kind of kinky fantasy involves a Cinderella outfit?
Do guys really fantasize about the Disney princesses that way?
Anonymous C says:
Man, you all those who post these topics about britney spears and other celebs, sorry, are pathetic.
Why do you people care about others peoples lives? Its pretty sad.
I’m not talking about those who post a comment, just those who post the topic.
Get a life.
Joy A says:
Anonymous C,
I posted your comment because I got a good laugh out of it and I’m sure Snarky will, too. Thank you.
Get back to me after you figure out what a gossip blog is and we can talk, anonymous. Luv ya.
janey says:
Somehow I doubt Brit has all that stuff. She strikes me as the type to just bend over and take it. No imagination in that girls brain.
Snarky says:
Hahahaha Anonymous C! It made you take the time to click comment and write something didn’t it?
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
BTW- It’s not our fault brit brit is a kinky bitch with lots-o-toys, shaves her head, almost drops her kid, has a horrible performance on the MTV awards, bad album, shitty new video, married the biggest douche bag in the world who now tries to take everything from her, drives with her kids in their seats incorrectly, runs over pap’s feet, wears a weave that looks like it came from Odd Lots, flashes her crotch every other month… Sould I go on? This Brit shit is what makes the news and so be it, Joy and I are gonna write about it! If she would just stay out of the paps view and quit doing ridiculous crap for a while, we wouldn’t have that much Brit jiz to write about.
Loves & Hugs,
Snarky-poo