It's Adnan, Bitch!

Dating Britney can do crazy things to a person. Take Adnan, once a humble paparazzo just trying to live the American dream. Now, he's Superdivo, shoving photogs and yelling at them, "Do you know who I am? You are nobody! Don't make me angry!"

I didn't know who Adnan was until Britney, and now that he's dipped his peen in the cesspool of curdled Frap juice and Cheetos crumbs, that's still not saying much. And one day, Adnan, Britney's going to dump yo ass and the royalties from your future tell-all book will stop coming in. Enjoy the fame while it's around, and for fug's sake, lose the mohawk and shave the pubes running down your chin. Thanks.