Just so You Know

I care much more about Starbucks closing 600 shops than I do about Kate Hudson dating Lance Armstrong. Well, I also care more about the poop I took last week than these two jerks.

I’m not into either of ‘em and I totally want Lance to knock her up and dump her, because I think she’s that much of a whore and a bitch. I’m totally gonna get dumped after I get preggers for saying that, but I feel that strongly about this skank, which, of course, has nothing to do with me being a bitter, angry bitch who needs to get laid. My feelings just happen to be what some label a “coincidence.”

Kate Hudson and Lance Armstrong step out to a beachside lunch – and they have company! The happy couple dined with Hudson’s mom, Goldie Hawn, Tuesday at Santa Monica eatery Ivy at the Shore, and the group “looked like they were having a great time.”

Flaunting your relationship at The Ivy?! I hate these tools. That reminds me, I haven’t been to the Ivy in so long. I must see Xtina Aguilera in clown face up close. My 5′4 ass should be out there front and center, knockin’ the paps down with my purse and getting pics for you guys. Heh.

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