January 2009 News Archive (Page 5)

When a TMZ "reporter" asked Jessica Alba what Barack's greatest characteristic was, she flipped the script and asked him the same question. The reporter got sheepish and didn't wanna answer, so Jess told him, "be neutral - be Sweden about it."

TMZ.com then said she's an "arrogant buffoon" and a "ditz" for saying Sweden instead of Switzerland when referring to the neutral country during WWII.

O'Reilly - whom Alba had called an "a-hole" at the same event - also called her "dumb" for mixing up the countries. But on her blog, Alba writes,

"I find it depressing that, in the midst of perhaps the most salient time in our country's history, individuals are taking it upon themselves to encourage negativity and stupidity. Last week, Mr. Bill O'Reilly and some really classy sites (i.e. TMZ) insinuated I was dumb by claiming Sweden was a neutral country.

"I appreciate the fact that he is a news anchor and that gossip sites are inundated with intelligent reporting, but seriously people... it's so sad to me that you think the only neutral country during WWII was Switzerland."

She then linked to a wikipedia article to prove Sweden was also a neutral country. Added Alba, "I appreciate the name calling and the accurate reporting. Keep it up!!"

Thanks for the encouragement, Jess. I will keep it up, as long as people keep reading POTP and ad networks pay me, I'll be keeping it up for a long, long time. Oh, and your baby is totally fug! If you weren't such a prick and an inaccessible bitchy diva, the media wouldn't be so anxious to tear you down.

source

Lindsay Lohan's rep says the rumors are just rubbish.

"Lindsay is aware that she's lost some weight due to stress, but we recently did a photo shoot and she ate two full meals."

Two meals = no eating disorder. Various bones sticking out from body = typical weightloss due to stress.

Everything about this bitch is a vanity project or an attention whore campaign. Lindsay Lohan is one of the most overly dramatic, talented, yet pretty useless stars in Hollyweird. She has to stick to her girlfriend like glue, has public breakdowns, began slicing her wrists again and now she's tiny again. Uh, I blame Samantha. Just call me Michael Lohan.

It wasn't for a magazine spread this time, but Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt finally revealed their gorgeous bloated twins, Knox Leon and Vivienne Marcheline.

The family of six made their Tokyo airport debut today proving that they are one hell of a gorgeous family! The kids are very obese in the cheeks, but they're gorgeous lil cuties.

source

I will have to tune in simply because I Love Money 1 was such a freakin' riot!

Click twice to enlarge.

Here's Mischa Barton arriving at the Paris Christian Dior show, reminding us females to wear a bra while wearing strapless tops.

Brittany Flickinger may have won over Paris Hilton, but now she has to win over music lovers' hearts as she enters the ultra competitive world that is mainstream pop music.

On her new song "Treat Me So Bad," Brittany's good vocals are hidden, and this track needs better production and catchy-ness, but she has the potential to actually go somewhere.

Paris Hilton's BFF show was a great launching pad for Brittany's music career and she's already on the Z-list map. If she can make decent songs, she has a chance, but songs like the one below can too easily be lost in the shuffle with all the other one-hit wonders. It sounds like a carbon copy of too many songs to mention. Also, with Paris recently ditching Britt for Aubrey O'Day, who else wants to think she wrote this about Paris?

I knew this rumor was just farts. There's no way in hell that Daddy Dude would be getting in snug outfits to ballroom dance and mamba. And you know he may be packin' some kinda booty at this point too.

Most important, would K-Well Fed and his moobs work into a sweat? There's traces of sperm in his sweat, tears, saliva and even snot. Female janitors shouldn't work on set with Federsperm, but could scientists do something with that shit? Daddy Dude's juices could really get the ball rollin' on this whole stem cell research thing.

Anyway, we have all been robbed of unprecedented levels of hilarity. Maybe next season.

People

Naked pics of Gwyneth models and a few models - CNW
Miley Cyrus gets Hillary Duff's teeth - CS
Yet another reason to hate Abercrombie - OMG
Katy Perry says she rather die than not have sex - AB
Real Housewives Gone Wild - CK
I've never seen a naked lady like this one - RR
Amanda Bynes' legs - ND
Tom Cruise gets questioned on farting while banging Katie Holmes - SP
The Anna Wintour documentary - B!
Paramedics called to Amy Poehler's house - GB
Jeremy Piven makes everyone's life a living hell - WIMB
Idiot diva Mariah Carey "furious" she was not seated next to Barack Obama at inauguration ball. - AG

Editor's Note: Strangest Google searches that led people to this site are in italics, words in plain text = my commentary.

1. i wish i had seen your bare bottom - I know you do, but not on the first date. I'm not that kinda ho.
2. in shape grandma blowjob - Grandmas who give head get in shape by doing so? Is there scientific evidence to back this up?
3. www.good lookin bitches.com- This site doesn't exist. Maybe someone was searching the URL name first and they wanna buy the domain name. It's a great name for a website and I suspect that Whoopi Goldberg will top the list.
4. christian woman who loves anal - Maybe it's a spiritual experience for her. It's like communion, only with more lube and less crackers.
5. "piss on her face" - But only after you get her off, please. Be a gentleman.
6. girls geting there bubes hit naked - Seriously, WTF is a BUBE? And why do I wanna start spelling boobs this way?
7. cute gentle lesbians - Sounds like a teddy bear I should buy my cousin for her bday.
8. how to avoid double chin in pictures - Try getting photographed with a foreign object in front of your double chinny chin chin, like an erect penis or a trumpet. That always works.
9. "there ain't nothing sexy about those bitches" - Ain't that the truf, gurlfriend! And that tall one better back off of my man or I'm gonna piss on her face!
10. pregnant girl how to child removed from ass video - I really wasn't gonna touch this one because it's strange enough to stand on its own, but I think some pregnant girl is trying to deliver her baby through her ass!!! Dear gawd, please edumacate this bitch. Or let me be completely wrong.
    

On whether he's Googled himself before,

"Dear God. No. Never. First of all, I don't really know how to operate a computer."

On what it's like to be a celebrity today,

"This publicity machine is out of control. It's everything we didn't sign up for. There's this whole other entity that you get sucked into. You have to go and sell your wares. It's something I never made my peace with. Somehow you're not supporting your film if you don't get out on a show and talk about your personal life. It has nothing to do with why I do this. I feel for the people who are just getting into the business, it sets the wrong focus."

I know for sure I would Google myself on a very frequent basis if I were famous. And get this, Ryan Seacrest did an interview at my former publication where his assistant said that Ryan Seacrest requests that he receives copies of ALL mentions of himself in the press. I felt so bad for him. People hate that man, he's just torturing himself.

Other secret: Ryan didn't like the article so he fired his assistant after we published it... I guess Ryan is no Brad Pitt and I know I would Google myself too. It would be so hard not to. Props to anyone who can resist the urge.

source: Newsweek