Say It Aloud or Don't Say It At All

If you're going to whisper in front of someone, you might as well just spread your butt cheeks and fart in their face. You'd make a much better impression that way.

You know that you are being talked about and it's only natural to become offended over this non-discreet, cowardly F-U. If you weren't being discussed, than why the hell would someone feel the need to whisper to someone else in your presence?!

You can just tell when folks are whispering about something random or other people, or when you're the topic of their hush hush. Then the person who receives the whisper doesn't make any eye contact with you during or shortly after the whisper because he or she doesn't wanna be obvious. While they aim to be discreet, they may as well both just point their finger in your face and shove 'em up your nostrils because you know these bitches was talkin' mad shit!

What to do when someone whispers in front of you?

Poke the person whispering and ask 'em WTF they're saying? Lean in so you can hear? Storm out? Tell 'em you don't like it? Any method of action you take has no effect on what has and will take place when The Whisperer and The Whisperee are together; in fact, any obvious reaction just gives them new material.

I was the witness and subject of a Whisperer and Whisperee exchange a few days ago. But I let it go quickly because what was I to do? I already knew that The Whisperer was a lil upset with me and her little one-way conversation with The Whisperee only confirmed it. I made sure to be on my best behavior and I also gave The Etiquette Violators and their friends much to laugh about at the dinner table. After I was victimized by their quiet verbal assault, I vowed to myself never to whisper in front of others again because I believe in talking shit behind people's backs rather than farting in faces.