They were going to get married, all! I'm so depressed. Young love always lasts forever ever.

Miley Cyrus and Justin Gaston "split" on Sunday. What the f*ck ever. They're kids. They probably broke up via text message and they'll reconcile by next week.

"They have been having trouble for a while. It's been hard for a long time since Miley has been working so much and traveling a lot. Miley and Nick are working on a couple different projects together. Justin has been a little jealous of that."

Who cares? Uh, I guess I'm supposed to. That's what my job description says. I love how UsWeekly picked a photo of Justin (above) where he looks all old to make him look like a pedophile. It didn't work, though, cause Miley doesn't look 16 in that photo either. I wonder who Miley will go out with next. Taylor Lautner is available now. Oh snap!