Rachel Uchitel is the first mistress in Tiger-gate, but she not only denied the National Enquirer's allegations, she called one of its sources "a f*cking hooker [who] wants money" and said she has "information to disprove the story."

The National Enquirer and Us Weekly both stood by its stories and reported that Rachel Uchitel did engage in an a sexual relationship with Tiger Woods. Rachel is finally admitting that Tiger did have his paws all over her.

She'll actually be giving a press conference today at 11:30 a.m. Pacific. I thought the whore was shamed, but a press conference?! I wish they put scarlet letters on these skanks like they used to back in the day in the movie.

Less than an hour before Tiger's accident, Rachel and Tiger were texting each other. Elin confronted Tiger and asked whom he was texting. She grabbed the phone and she called Rachel to confront her. According to sources, Tiger and Elin began arguing and the phone broke in the process.

I so wanna see Tiger's battle scars from the night of his crash. Elin probably did eff up his face. For now, all we have is this Photoshopped pic.

Correction: This post was typed at 2:49 a.m. Pacific. The Scarlet Letter is a book and a movie, duh. Never happened in real life. That was a poorly-worded reference that I corrected today. When you're typing at almost 3 a.m. in the morning, unicorns and toothfairies also make a lot of sense to you.

UPDATE: The Rachel Uchitel press conference has been canceled.