Brittney Jones Claimed to be Pregnant With Ashton Kutcher's Baby

With all these stories about Charlie Sheen, and Brett Favre, and guys who were basically caught with their dicks out, it's interesting to hear about further scandal involving Ashton Kutcher, a guy who has every reason to cheat (his wife is 400 years old), but probably didn't. Yeah, my guess is that Ashton is innocent, but the media loves a good ho story, so they continue to talk to professional homewrecker Brittney Jones.

Fortunately, the latest revelation about Brittney should convince everyone once and for all that she's full of sh!t. Turns out that after having sex with Ashton, Brittney "thought" she was pregnant, because "her period was late for at least a month," and she immediately tried to sell the story to a number of media outlets. Obviously, the deal was ruined when Brittney found out she wasn't really pregnant.

Word of advice, Britt, before you try to make millions off the famous fetus in your belly, you might wanna wait a couple months to make sure the little guy really exists. This chick probably had her publicist on the phone while she was still peeing on the Clearblue stick. Nah, on second thought, I don't even believe she ever thought she was pregnant. I think she just figured she'd cash in, wreck a marriage, and go on her merry way. This is, after all, the chick who claimed to have gross inter-generational threesomes with Ashton and Demi. She really just needs to go away.