That explains it. Every time I saw a picture of Clinton Yunkers, I wondered what Amber Portwood could possibly see in this pasty redneck nerd who already has a kid of his own. After all, she has money now, and at a slender 180 pounds, she's the Kate Moss of rural Indiana. Turns out he and Amber have more in common than just a hatred for all of forms of birth control - they've both had run-ins with the law! Are these two a match made in parenting heaven, or what?

Clinton pleaded guility to misdemeanor charges against him twice in the last three years - once for marijuana possession and once for...wait for it - battery! Oh, good! Two violent, unfit parents raising a pair of kids together! The next season of Teen Mom should be sponsored by WWE, because these two are sure to face off in some epic domestic throwdowns, the likes of which the trailer park has never seen.

Radar Online tracked down Amber's dad, Shawn (who was presumably asleep under a mobile meth lab at the time), and he seemed strangely cool with the his daughter's new step-baby daddy's shady past, "I'm not concerned. I believe Amber is a good judge of character," Shawn said. "I've heard of him, but don't know that much about him. I don't know anything about her relationship with her new boyfriend. If it's a misdemeanor, it was a misdemeanor. And she's always been somewhat of a good judge of character usually." Yeah! Why don't y'all just relax? It's just some misdemeanors, y'all! *pounds 16 ounce Red Dog, crushes can against forehead*

Shawn was also asked if he was at all concerned by the fact that Clinton is a trained mixed martial arts fighter. "Amber can handle herself," he laughed. "As we all know she does a little fighting herself." Sigh. It's funny until you remember these people are allowed to have children.