Charlie Sheen‘s publicist quit, so there’s no one to tell him to stop giving lunatic interviews wearing the same filthy clothes in every one and sounding more and more like he’s live from a Hollywood mental hospital. The only ones around to tell Charlie what a crazy a-hole he’s being are his “goddesses,” Rachel Oberlin, better known as the porn star Bree Olsen, and Natalie Kenly, who gets naked with pot for a living, or something. And of course, they’re not gonna talk Chuckles down as long as his checks keep clearing.

Part two of Charlie’s Today Show interview aired this morning and he and the goddesses talked about how normal life is in “Sober Valley Lodge” (Charlie’s nickname for his house, because, ya know, there’s nothing weird about that) and how great the pornstar and pot model are with Charlie’s twin toddlers. Jeez, why is anyone worried about this guy?

The goddesses said they watch Two and a Half Men, and come up with “fun ideas” to keep busy (coke orgies are always a fun idea in the Sheen home). Charlie, meanwhile, fired back at the Twitter haters who said he looks “disheveled” and sounds like he “smokes a carton a day.”  “Get a job, anyone?” Charlie shot back. Um, Chuck, last I checked, you’re the one who’s not working much these days.

DO YOU THINK CHARLIE SHEEN IS SOBER?