Zooey Deschanel's incompetent lawyer attached her income and expense declaration to his or her client's divorce papers. Zooey was married to Death Cab for Cutie singer Ben Gibbard for two years.

Zooey and Ben officially split on Hallloween of last year. She cited "irreconcilible differences" as the reason for their split. I need to start using that when I tell folks to get lost! Anyway, here's the breakdown of Zooey's funds. We know you can't help yourself:

-- Zooey -- who stars in "New Girl" -- makes an average of $95,000 a month
-- Her expenses average $22,550 a month
-- She has 3 credit cards ... AmEx, Visa and Mastercard, all of which have a 0 balance.
-- She has $1,578,000 in the bank
-- Zooey has an additional $1,645,000 in stocks, bonds, etc.
-- Zooey has real and personal property valued at $693,300

Zooey spends $1k on groceries and household supplies, $500 on eating out, $800 on utilities, $300 for various phones and email accounts, $600 in laundry and cleaning and $2k on clothes. What's really cool is that she also donates $1,500/ month to charity! Zooey's pretty fierce! If I made $95k/ month, I'd have $93k/month worth of expenses.