Of course this story is true. Radar Online reports that a sex tape featuring Kanye West having sex with a woman who bears a striking resemblance to Kim Kardashian (no, not the Old Navy girl) is currently being shopped to potential buyers.

Kanye is reportedly “terrified” of the 20 minute film going public, and from the descriptions available, we can see why. Sources say his co-star reveals that she’s only 18 at the start of the film, then states that she and her husband no longer have sex? Where do you find these cynical married teenagers, Yeezy?

Those who have seen the tape say it appears Kanye shot it himself and that he does use protection. But despite his responsible stance on safe sex, insiders say, “He doesn’t want this tape out and will do anything to make sure it stays private, but there would definitely be a lot of people wanting to see this!” Consider me one of them!