Lady Gaga is not a real person, but a carefully crafted public image designed to portray Stefani Germanotta as an always stylish, always original super-human. Needless to say, it was not in the best interest of Camp Gaga when the Mother Monster suffered the most mortal of digestive tract malfunctions on stage in Barcelona over the weekend. Especially since Justin Bieber totally already puked on stage like a week ago. Lame, you guys:

That's Gaga sharing the stage with every meal she's every eaten in the past six months. No word as to what prompted Gaga to gag-a, but in one of several tweets on the subject, the singer joked, “Was praying nobody saw but actually its quite a good laugh if u need one! Check out Lady PukeGA doing Swan ”Vomit” Lake.”Ha…um, hey comedy's not her strong suit.

Regardless, this video gives me an idea. As someone who vomits in public regularly, I feel I should be followed around by a thoroughly waxed back-up dancer who will gyrate on command every time I open the floodgates. No one has to see what I ate for breakfast and evidence of my alcoholism doesn't end up on YouTube. I call that a win-win.