After splitting with Alex Loudon, Pippa Middleton has joined the ranks of the singletons once again, and part of the reason why is because her @ss wasn’t good enough to put a ring on it (according to his family). A mutual friend told the Daily Mail that the Loudon clan thinks Pippa’s not good enough for their high-class son.

“Alex’s parents were welcoming but they were always somewhat lukewarm about the relationship. They didn’t see Pippa as ‘wife material’.”

Ouch! Pippa might not have the discretion and formality that comes with old money pedigree, but she’s royally related. Shouldn’t that count for something? At least the leeway to be a little more ostentatious and publicly drunk sometimes than the average nouveau riche?

“James and Jane are very old-fashioned and prefer to keep things low-key.”

All I can think of that moment in Pride and Prejudice when Judi Dench is b!tching out Kiera Knightley and deems her a “young women of inferior birth,” with her nose turned up. You show ‘em, Pippa!

Pippa Middleton and Alex Loudon broke up three weeks ago. Alex is hoping that they "can still work things out," Us Weekly reports. Pippa, 28, and Alex, 31, were set up on a blind date by mutual friends. They broke up in June of this year, only to get back together weeks later.

A source told The Sun newspaper: "Pippa tried to get over the split by spending last weekend with Wills and Kate at Balmoral. She and Alex split briefly in the summer, but this time it's over. They are barely speaking."

Pippa wants to "travel and work abroad," but Alex is unable to get long weekends off from work and he can't have many nights out during the week. Sounds like a reasonable reason to break up to me! Sadly, I don't even know if I'm being sarcastic or not. Heh.

Here are new photos of Pippa Middleton that were taken over the weekend. These pictures are a big deal because Pippa is showing "cleavage." This chick has yet to do it for me, especially since we've learned that her ghetto booty at the Royal wedding was fake.

Pippa couldn't possibly be more blah to me. Her hair does nothing for her big a*s forehead, she has no hips, she looks like she has a moustache, and I'm not feeling that flower bow thing in the middle of her frock. Sigh. Good thing her handsome boyfriend Alex Loudon doesn't seem to mind. What Pippa does have going for her is her size. She's the petite chick who will always make you feel huge because she's just so damn small.

Photos: Wenn

Pippa Middleton turns 28 today. For those of you who have been plugging your ears and going "la la la" whenever the topic of the Royal Wedding came up - Pippa is the sister of the Duchess of Cambridge, aka Kate Middleton. She's famous for her @ss, and not much else, so if she's anything like her American counterpart, she'll soon marry a professional basketball player just so she can sell the honeymoon photos.

Unlike Kim Kardshian, however, Pippa actually works for a living and she appears to have no interest in a reality show. She does share Kim's love of athletes, though. Pippa and Alex Loudon, a former cricket player, have been on and off for several years, and are rumored to be planning on tying the knot in the near future.

For now, however, Pippa already has plenty to celebrate. There are entire Facebook pages devoted to her butt and her sister may one day be the queen, which probably gets her out of all kinds of parking tickets. Happy birthday, Pippa!

(Photos: WENN)

Pippa Middleton is single. Or she's not. No one really seems to be sure except for her, so naturally the whole world is trying to figure out the relationship status of the woman who may be the UK's most eligible bachelorette. One British magazine has even taken to polling its readers with a list of available guys in an effort to help Pippa get hitched.

Because Pippa is probably looking to tabloid-style magazines to find her future husband, the latest issue of Tatler offers a comprehensive list of single British dudes who might be willing to put a ring on it. Some of the candidates make sense, like Alex Loudon, who Pippa is probably currently dating. Others are out of left field, like singer James Blunt and son of the French president, Pierre Sarkozy.

Pippa is intensely private about her love life, so for all we know, she may already be close to settling down. No one knows how much longer she'll be England's most coveted single shagging partner, but she probably has at least a few more years of being the world's most overrated "beauty."

(Photos: Tatler, WENN)

Half of England and the Americans who are obsessed with Pippa Middleton were high fiving each other when it was rumored that Pippa and Alex Loudon had broke up. Those guys held onto that little glimmer of hope that one of them might get lucky enough to tap that booty.

It was revealed a few days ago that the duo are still together, so all of those men who thought they could have a chance with Pippa, need to put those hopes and dreams in their back pocket for another day.

The twosome attended Wimbledon together sitting with Pippa's parents, Michael and Carole Middleton to watch Roger Federer and Jo-Wilfried Tsonga smack it out on the tennis courts. Folks say Pippa and Alex were flirty with each other and walked into the tournament hand in hand.

The royal hotness may be off the market, but you've still got your fantasies and imagination to work that shiz out.

Photos: WENN

What a sad day. It looks like Pippa Middleton is, in fact, still attached to her longtime boyfriend Alex Loudon. This means that in the coming months, we will be deprived of both Pippa’s party-hard side and a wonderful opportunity to play a mental version of The Royal Dating Game. Bah! Ruins all the fun.

A family member nixes the idea that Pippa’s a free woman or that she’s been getting down with ex-boyfriend George Percy. “All the rumors are completely untrue.”

Another source insists that the couple's bond is stronger than ever and that even though her buddy George is super-loaded, Pippa is still madly in love with Alex. Even though they haven’t been photographed together since Kate’s wedding, it’s only because they keep their relationship on the DL.

“Pippa doesn’t fancy George, she’s very into Alex. Alex is the nicest chap you could meet. He’s incredibly sweet, loyal, and adores Pippa, but they make a point of seeing each other very privately and don’t go to flash places.”

That description makes him sound a bit like a really good dog, but maybe that’s all Pippa wants in a boyfriend.

Photos: Wenn

Some men may have lost their wood when they found out Pippa Middleton has a boyfriend, but their relationship may not last too much longer if his jealousy keeps getting in the way. Alex Loudon allegedly proposed to Pippa months ago, but she told him they should hold off because it "would steal Kate's limelight."

Alex agreed but his jealousy has become more obvious since the royal wedding.

“Alex was furious because he felt Prince Harry overstepped his brother-in-law boundaries and flirted outrageously with Pippa. He confronted her about it the next day, but she just laughed it off. Now Alex is saying: ‘Enough is enough!’ He wants the world to know Pippa’s taken.”

Don't do it, Pippa! It sounds like he just wants to claim her as a damn award and put her on the mantle to collect dust. He doesn't want the rest of the world to oggle over the hotness he gets to take to bed at night.

Photos: WENN

Pippa Middleton isn't royalty herself, but she's related to royalty, so her life is all about class, dignity...and having hundreds of thousands of people talk about her @ss.

Pippa has proven to be quite a hit with the Brits following the Royal Wedding, with one body part in particular capturing the fascination of men worldwide. "The Pippa Middleton Arse Appreciation Society" Facebook page has gained over 200,000 "likes" and been discussed on BBC talk shows in the UK. That's a lot of attention for one @ss.

Sadly, these days, Pippa's butt belongs to one man, but it seems that if things don't work out with Alex Loudon, she has plenty of options. Personally, I don't get the obsession. Seems like a pretty ordinary @ss. Guess they don't see much ghetto booty in Britain. 

All of you men who have been drooling over Pippa Middleton and praying for a chance to land someone so close to royalty for yourself, please put your tongues away.... Pippa Middleton has a boyfriend. *sigh*

Pippa is currently dating 30 year-old Alex Loudon. Who? Exactly. Alex is actually a pal of Prince William since the two attended the prestigious UK prep school Eton together. Alex used to be a sporty cricket player but retired and decided to follow in his father James Loudon's businessman footsteps and attended the London Business School, and currently works as a stockbroker.

Pippa and Alex have been dating for a year and it sounds like it's serious enough for them to eventually make the walk down the aisle themselves.

Alex and Pippa "have been virtually living together in London, and Pippa is a regular visitor to his family's stately home in Kent, Olantigh Towers. Alex can't see himself spending his future with anyone else, and Pippa, although very picky, thinks Alex ticks all the right boxes — he has the family pile in the country, a smart job in London and he is very handsome."

It's a sad day for any man who thought he had the chance to bag a Middleton girl.