Ali Lohan
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Somebody call child services on Dina Lohan cause her kids are out of control! We've already learned that by watching Lindsay Lohan over the years, but now Ali is dressing like a prostitute. 

Not only is she dressed like a street walker, but she looks like she's 3 sheets to the wind too. Lindsay was probably slipping her some vodka in a water bottle so Ali could get her drink on. I'm not sure if this is a designer dress or something Ali Lohan found in a thrift store, but it ain't pretty. With that deathly pale skin you would think she's trying out for a part in the Twilight series. It's just all wrong. What's interesting is Lindsay looks half way decent, which tends to happen very rarely.

Lindsay Lohan is teaching her little sister Ali the ropes to being a young, drinking, and partying celebrity.

The pair were seen together at LA's Crown Bar recently doing shots out of each others lint crusted belly button. No, they weren't doing shots out of belly buttons. I couldn't help but throw their belly buttons into it.

"I couldn't believe Ali was there. They partied until after 1 a.m., and she treated Ali as if she were just one of her friends at the club with her. And Ali was excited to be there. She loved being out on the scene with her sister. It was as if she knew she belonged there."

Lindsay is a seasoned pro, so teaching little Ali Lohan how to drink vodka out of water bottles, and to take a toot or two of coke in the girl's bathroom will be a cinch. I've got a feeling Ali will end up in the train wrecks category in the next 2 years.

Dina Lohan is a train wreck of a mother but she's pretty well known. Like Michael Lohan, Dina has always sought out attention by speaking with the media very very frequently.

Now that she's a bit of a household name, she doesn't need her Living Lohan reality show on E! anymore. But Dina Lohan is burning bridges by saying that E! producers wanted her and her fam to engage in lie-telling (aka standard acting on all reality shows), and so she turned down a second season.

Dina says, "They wanted us to do these crazy things, like my son cheating on his girlfriend, me faking a pregnancy. I was like, 'No, no, no! They had ideas that weren't conducive to our ideas."

Makes you wonder what exactly her ideas were! Dina already tried to get 15 year-old Ali to gain entrance into a 21+ nightclub. Does she want scenes like that featured on the show? If so, Dina should try switching networks and create a new show with a new title: Lohans, Crazy B*tches Who Don't Need No Scripts! Pow.

Ali Lohan was posing for photographer Jonathan Ressler. Apparently he's having an exhibit for Extraordinary Women, or at least that's what its called.

I would like to ask him what's so extraordinary about Ali? Is it her 40-year-old fashion sense? Her obnoxious performance on Living Lohan? The fact that she hasn't killed her mother yet? Or is it that she finds nothing wrong with wanting to be like her big sister?

Do you get my point yet? She isn't extraordinary! She's a 15-year-old spoiled brat. She's actually the opposite of extraordinary, especially in these pictures. I will admit she does look pretty, but anyone who thinks its sexy could be called a pedophile. That's not good.

PS: Take those blue contacts out! They creep me the fuck out.

Lindsay Lohan's little sis, Ali, is currently shooting a film in LA called "Mostly Ghostly." I'm sure we'll see this movie go straight to DVD. If her acting is anything like Lindsay's, the ho better find a new profession.

Ali's role shares similarities with her older sister's character in the 2004 film Mean Girls: She'll play "a popular high school senior" in the film, says a source. The film, slated for release later this year, is based on the pre-teen book series Mostly Ghostly written by R.L. Stine, which centers on an 11-year-old boy who befriends two ghosts.

It sounds like a crappy version of Casper the Friendly Ghost. Yep, this shit isn't going to make it into the movie theaters! Give Ali a couple more years and she'll have her own sex tape that will make her famous... Not her acting.

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Dina Lohan's reality show will be hitting the E! network this summer as she continues on her quest of being white Oprah. Dina will show us how easy it is to turn your children into fame whores in a small amount of time!

Viewers will go inside the Lohan's Long Island home for the first time to follow Dina as she works double duty as mom and manager to help Ali try to follow in her big sister [Lindsay's] famous footsteps," a press release for the show says. Cameras will also follow the duo to Vegas as Ali records an album. "Dina is determined to help each of her four kids fulfill their dreams and refuses to live in fear of what others may think, despite being under the paparazzi microscope," the press release adds.

I feel sorry for Ali having someone like Lindsay to look up to. Ali should work on finding a cure for irritable bowel syndrome for people like me instead of working on becoming the next rehab whore. Since she's not gonna go that route, you know I'm gonna be watching this ridiculous Lohan show with the rest of you.

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"I grew up watching Lindsay, and it made me want to do what she does. Just the whole vibe. Being there, being on camera, or onstage, with everybody listening to you…it's so cool when people look up to you. I've already been asked for my autograph, and it's just a really good feeling to have."

Ali also says in the interview that she wants to get into Hollywood "so bad. So bad you don't even know. And now, it's actually happening." Who doesn't want to grow up and be just like their older sibling? It's ok if she wants to be a crotch showing, fake tanned, washed up, rehab Hollywood whore before she's 21! Sounds like Momma Lohan trained Ali to say that crap to make Lindsay look like a good role model, which she's not.

Ali, next time you're interviewed try to strive a little higher than being like Lindsay. You should go for someone a little classier like Paris. ;) The entire interview will be in the April issue of Teen Vogue which comes out March 10th.

A pissed off Michael Lohan hit up OK! magazine to respond to Ali's defensive email, deflecting any responsibility for the Lohans' turmoil while continuing to ostracize himself from his family, sticking his head even further up his own ass.

OK!: What is the first thing that went through your mind when you heard about Ali's letter?

Michael Lohan: I said, ‘Get me on the phone with David Kaplan.' For Ali to say that I was never there and I'm lying…People who have known us for 25 years know that I have always been there for my kids. These lies have got to stop because they are having an effect on my children. We don't realize in life is that what I do affects my kids.

OK!: Is it a chain reaction?

Michael: Absolutely, it's a reciprocal effect, it's like a pebble in a pond. Everyone gets affected by it, but we don't realize it and I certainly didn't in my life and I should have. Now you get these things on VH-1 being written by my daughter Ali. Ali was too young to remember any of this. And you know what, reflect back on Lindsay's soundtrack, "Daughter to Father, Confessions of a Broken Heart," read the words �" "I wait for the postman to bring me a letter, I wait for the good lord to make me better, I carry the weight of the world on my shoulders, a family in crisis that only gets older." And then she goes on to say, "where are you now daddy I love you, I love you." It's a story of love and caring about a father.

OK!: You just want your daughters to be happy? In the end that's what a father wants for their children, to be happy?

Michael: I just wanted to help. You know I just wanted to be there for my kids and make Lindsay a success. She's blessed and gifted.

OK!: Are you proud of Lindsay?

Michael: Lindsay is my daughter, I love her to death. You know if I could serve the time for her in jail I would myself, if they allowed me to I would. If I could die for my kids I would. I gladly, without a blink of an eye, give my life for my children. And that's what it's about, loving my kids.


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Lindsay's little sis wrote to David at 24sizzler.com.

Hi david this is ali lohan,

i want everybody to know the truth out there. My mom is a single mom of four children she has always been there for us, she was my mother and father and still is. My father is telling all lies to people and saying he was such a great dad and was always there for us, my father was never there for us, My mom was always there souporting us.

i think that the whole reason why my sister is upset with her self and not as cofident, is because of my dad not being around, and always staying out late and not coming home for days, he would come back home never himself, he was always was making excuses for his bad behavior .

And would always blame my mother. He just wants everybody in the world knowing that he was a great dad. He wasnt that is all a lie. I just want my sister to stick throught this okay, and my mother and brothers and i are there for my sister 100% and have always been.

I've wanted to say this for so long and get this out there and let everyone know that our family is like a normal family but of course we are put under a microscope because of lindsays fame, lindsay will be fine she is just going through a rough time right now but she will be fine.

i know this for a fact. My sisters is just like a normal sister. her and I have so much in common. My mother and sister are huge insperations to me, they have made it through so much in there lives.

Thankyou for your time god bless, Ali

Forget the typos, Ali deserves props for breaking it down! Michael Lohan has been showing his face on Larry King Live and flapping his gums to the paps with every opportunity he gets. He needs to shut it up! He was a horrible Daddy Dude and his kids hate his ass. He has a long way to go.

I'm with Ali on all this, Dina Lohan was always there for Lindsay and look how well that turned out. Can you blame the ho for being so screwed up? The whole family needs rehab and Michael's no saint. I hope Linds gets better soon and I honestly believe she will.

I'd love for Michael to write some ridiculous response. What the hell would he say now?

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