Grown Folks' Business (Page 9)

Jimi Hendrix isn't just a guitar god, but he's also a sex tape star! A new video, which reportedly shows Jimi getting his freak on, will be released this summer.

The film is titled Jimi Hendrix: The Story Of The Lost Sex Tape and purportedly features the Purple Haze hit-maker in 11 minutes of pornographic footage. The clips are said to have been discovered in 2007 and will now be released on DVD by distribution company Kaleidoscope.

I'm curious to see if he handles his tube steak as well as he handles a guitar. I wonder if he can make a vagina burst into flames too? My curiosity will be detained once I see the video.

Warning: This post is not safe for heterosexual men!

Big Brother's Steven Daigle has been caught with his pants down and his penis up. The Big Brother "cowboy" castoff is the newest reality TV celeb turned porn star.

In Steven's sextape, now available for purchase online, Steven is seen engaging in bathroom sex. So dirty. We're not linking to his grown folk's business here because we respect our heterosexual male readers, but here's a hint: Steve gets pounded while wearing a jockstrap and positioned on a barrel of hay. Now that's keeping it country, cowboy!

Tara Reid looks like an airbrushed blow-up doll with nappy hair in her Playboy photospread.

Tara Reid only goes topless and her left nipple is like directly below her arm in the uncensored version of the picture above. So damn hawt!

Tara has come a long way, and as long as she's happy with the pics, than that is all that matters. But as far as my two cents goes, Tara's not taking this Z-list thing gracefully and she needs to accept her new has been status. I also think her boobs should be perkier, considering that she bought 'em. In one word: FAIL.

Uncensored pics

Levi Johnston didn't reveal his penis in his Playgirl spread, but luckily another Levi Johnston will give plenty of full frontal.

Gay porn studio Jet Set Productions is filming "Getting Levi's Johnson" this weekend.

The role of Levi is played by relative porn new comer Casey (one name, like Liberace), who actually looks quite a bit like Johnston—they're both very pale, have silly tattoos, and have that handsome, vacant stare that makes us weak in the knees.

Really, Gawker? What do I like about Levi? His voice. I'm a sucker for a deep, 'manly voice,' and his baby face. That's about it for me. His vacant stare makes me wanna slap him. No weakening of the knees takes place over this tool.

The parody will follow Levi's life including his Pistachio commercial, Vanity Fair shoot and his Playgirl spread. The flick will be available in February or March.

Cleveland Indians center fielder Grady Sizemore says that the pictures of him doing the classic mirror sexy shots were "stolen" from his girlfriend Brittany Binger's email.

This weekend Grady said,

"These pictures were stolen illegally from my girlfriend's e-mail. It's now a legal matter that is under investigation. I can't say anything more."

You know what? I'm so happy that the pictures were stolen because Grady is damn hawt! As much as I say folks should not take scandalous pictures of themselves and send them to their partners, Grady makes me rethink my stance.

Thank you!

IMAGES REMOVED PER REQUEST

If Tila Tequila is going to be featured in any pornographic or nude footage, she wants to be the one to instigate it. Tila claims that a sex tape of hers was leaked from her laptop that was stolen TWO YEARS AGO.

She just had a lengthy drunken rant that was posted on her Ustream account last week and she's clearly on the Z-list. Time for a sex tape scandal!

Tila's lawyer said: "A police report has been filed for Tila's stolen laptop computer which contained that specific clip. I am currently in the process of sending a cease and desist letter and a notice of intent to sue if it's not removed."

I wonder if Tila's lawyer is familiar with his client's crazy. In light of her recent antics, does he even think that Tila's lawsuit against Shawne Merriman is going anywhere? I'm not so sure he even fathoms that she could be behind this leak herself.

She's so talentless, porn is her best option.

After months upon months of hype, Levi Johnston's naked Playgirl pictures are finally here. I think he looks really hot, which could possibly have something to do with me thinking he's really hot when he has clothes on, too, but I digress.

I would have prefered much more bareback shots and he should have given us at least some side peen to work with, but bloggers can't be choosers. I'll take it. Also, considering what Levi looked like before he hit the gym, physique wise, all of his intense workouts and dieting paid off. Good for him.

I must say I'm a little disappointed cause there isn't a hockey stick anywhere in these pictures. I had great perverse photoshoot ideas involving a hockey stick and some pucks and his nuts that have yet to come into fruition.

And by "action," I mean nothing happens that you can stroke to, but there are, indeed, two chicks in a bed together wearing heels that could leave holes in your mattress.

Carmen Electra is like Pam Anderson, she's never gonna stop trying to be sexy. If I had that body, I'm not so sure I would stop either. I'd be flashing workers in the nursing home and offering to give head without my dentures in. Workin' it forever!

You're gonna see some of the worst acting and faux sexiness and chemistry ever in this video. Enjoy?

Jump in for the "lesbian sex tape."

It's gross to think about your parents doing a little bump and grind but it's worse to imagine Ozzy Osbourne getting his rocks off with his wife Sharon. In a recent interview, Ozzy made it clear that just because he's getting old, doesn't mean he can't give Sharon a good poking.

"We have good sex. My kids think it's obscene that me and Sharon still have sex, but just because you get older, your d--k don't fall off."

Just imagine if you were in bed with Ozzy who was coming up from giving you some oral lovin' and the photo above is the image you see. That's hot! Any old fart who wears guyliner and has to use that little blue pill to keep his d*ck hard, can climb into my bed any day.

Adam Lambert really is here for your entertainment. Whether he's screaming on stage, grinding his hips suggestively, or forgetting to put chapstick on his lips, he never fails to intrigue.

Adam Lambert was named Out magazine's Breakout Star of 2009. In exchange, the rising rock star really opened up.

On being Adam Lambert:

“I’m doing the best I f*cking can, you know? I’m the same guy doing the same thing on a larger scale. I’ve always been an entertainer.”

On competing on American Idol:

“It’s about making a good TV show. I just wanted to be really careful that it didn’t turn into a fucking pageant. I can sing my face off. All this other stuff is part of a personality, a persona.”

On his gay makeout pictures hitting the Internet:

“I was like, ‘Great, that’s gonna f*ck things up.’ It was the first time since I’d come out of the closet at 18 that I had to think about it.

On coming out of the closet:

It’s part of who I am, but because our nation is the way it is, it’s an announcement. If I lose some fans, fuck it. I need to be happy too.”

Adam talks about going down on a fishy fish taco after the jump...