In Case Someone Cares (Page 5)

We are all under attack! Jon Gosselin's "slobification of America" clothing will soon be hitting stores nationwide. What terrorism level does this one fall under on the color code?

While attending a VMA after party, the soon-to-be divorced father of eight talked to the press about his fashion plans.

Jon says that he's doing a line called "Gosselin Gear." He also dissed Ed Hardy owner Christian Audigier, saying, “I think Christian just used me to get publicity.” If that's the case, Jon was dumb enough to fall for it by wearing that crap every single day! Does this mean Jon Gosselin will stop wearing all that Douche Gear?

As far as how everything else is going with Jonny, he says, “I’ll be officially divorced in a couple days." He also added that his relationship with his 22 year-old girlfriend, Hailey Glassman, is going "great." You know Jon's relationship is going better than Gosselin Gear's gonna go. The name alone says it all: TRASH that we will all see at discount stores within months of its release.

In case you need to be reminded, here's some examples of Jon's fashion nonsense.

Kate Gosselin's famous dyke meets Christian Siriano hairdo looks completely different. Although I think Kate's new hairstyle makes her look more like a diva, for whatever reason, it looks great on her!

I did catch some of Kate on The View the past two days, and she did a great job. She's good at being in front of an audience and I swear the woman continues to get hotter by the day! I have NO CLUE how Jon Gosselin was able to land her in the first place, or leave her now after all her improvements.

Check out more of Kate's new hair pics and her evolution to hotness below.

Thank Gawd for Paris Hilton and Doug Reinhardt. My TV has been playing in the background all day and I swear I've heard that "Beyonce's video is one of the greatest of all time" about 47 times already. Make it stop!

So I'm taking a VMA break to post some pictures of life-sized Barbie and Ken in Milan, Italy.

Paris Hilton's star power continues to fade. I seriously saw these photos and I remembered that: Paris is still breathing, she's still with Doug Reinhardt, she still has massive clown feet, and she continues to look more and more like a bird as her resemblance to her mother grows stronger each day. Sigh. I don't even know if Paris' BFF show is even good anymore. I loved season 1, but didn't check out season 2.

Attention seeker Kim Zolciak of the Real Housewives of Atlanta was in West Hollywood last night where she danced with a local drag queen named Detox.

Kim had a lot of competition in the beauty department with the queen because his wig looked better than most of Wiggy Kimmy's. Kim raises her glass of wine in the air as Detox shakes it better than her. Toward the end, a black dude begins dancing on stage with Kim. Bad idea. Kim's a racist, she makes racist statements here and there on The Real Housewives and she told Essence magazine that she would never date a black man. The dude isn't on the stage for long and Kim's topless photo is on display in the background. I'm sure she'll use that pic promote everything that she does.

I really do like this song even though it hurts my soul to say so.

Katherine Heigl and her D-list musician hubby Josh Kelly are adopting a 10-month old girl from Korea.

For the past six months, Katherine and Josh have been going through the adoption process. Katherine's rep confirmed the news. The baby's name is Nayleigh, but Katherine plans on calling her Leigh instead.

It was only a year ago that Kat said that she wants to start having a family. She later said that she wants to adopt.

Katherine's sister was also adopted from Korea. The Grey's Anatomy diva is 30 years old. I commend her for postponing on busting out her own offspring for now.

Home wrecker Rose McGowan needs to stop doing her own stunts before she kills herself! I never knew she was such a stunt woman anyway?

Rose got all banged up on the set of her upcoming film directed by her fiance, Robert Rodriguez.

“I had wrist and elbow surgery and they took part of my elbow out. I had really bad nerve damage from doing stunts - I do a lot of my own stunts. I could no longer use my arm, but now I can hold a fork and drive so we’re working our way up. It’ll probably be another six months of rehab, but It’s the price you pay for being really limber and being able to do back flips!”

There's nothing funny about hitting your funny bone and now Rose doesn't have a whole one. I think it's time she leaves the stunts to the professionals. Nothing is wrong with letting someone else take the pain while you sit there looking pretty. Or at least sit there looking like a hot plastic surgery mess!

Audrina Patridge is quitting The Hills. The 24 year-old has been pursuing acting and is currently developing her own reality show with Survivor producer Mark Burnett.

Audrina said,

"I'm almost done with The Hills. We’re in the middle of finishing these episodes, and I'll be leaving then. It feels like I'm graduating. I'm taking the next step and growing up and maturing and moving on in my life."

Audrina will allso appear in the soon to be released thriller Sorority Row.

Anyone else curious to find out what Audrina's new reality show will be about exactly? How about posting a large timer at the bottom of the screen which counts how many seconds it takes her to rush to the bathroom after consuming an entire meal?

Watching Audrina go to auditions while a camera crew films it isn't enough to keep viewers interested; she needs to remain nearly nekkid in order to at least get the perverts to tune in.

Since Paris Hilton will never win a decent award for herself, she's pushing for her rat of a dog, Tinkerbell, to win his own award.

Paris is begging British fans to vote for Tinkerbell in the Top Celebrity Dog Contest and he's up against stiff competition. Tinkerbell has to beat out other dogs such as Britney Spears' Bit Bit, and Nicole Richie's Foxxy Cleopatra.

The socialite's pet Chihuahua is among the favorites to land a leading prize at the upcoming Boomerang Pet Personality Awards, and she's taking the contest so seriously she has asked devotees to vote for her mutt.

In a post to followers on micro-blogging site Twitter.com, Hilton writes, "Hey guys can u (sic) support me and Tink and vote us for this adorable award show?"

Even if Paris could enter herself in the contest she wouldn't win. I'm pushing for Barack Obama's dog, Bo! We should all just be evil bitches and vote for Nicole Richie's mutt, just to snub little miss wonk-eye. Down with Paris, down with Tink!

Melanie Griffith, 52, checked herself into Lindsay Lohan's former joint, the Cirque Lodge in Utah. Her stay is reportedly "routine."

"She is there to reinforce her commitment to stay healthy," her rep told ET. "This is part of a routine plan that was designed between her and her doctors years ago."

This isn't the first time the 52-year-old mother of three -- and wife to Antonio Banderas -- has gone to rehab.

The actress sought treatment in 2000 for an addiction to painkillers, which she started using after suffering a neck injury. She also spent time at a facility 1988 to battle alcoholism and cocaine addiction.

Dancing With the Stars has 16 competitors this season and it seems like ABC threw together the most random group of contestants for ratings.

The Dancing With the Has Beens cast includes Macy Gray, Kelly Osbourne, Mya, Aaron Carter and former Republic congressman Tom DeLay who was indicted on criminal charges that he had conspired to violate campaign finance laws. In summary, he's a douche and so are most of the contestants this year. I don't even know who the eff most of these tools are.

The complete list is after the jump.