Britney has been granted 1 overnight visit per week with K-Fed's meal tickets, Sean Preston and Jayden James Federline. The visitations will be monitored and the court has yet to decide and identify who the monitor will be.Britney was also apparently actin' country while in the courtroom yesterday.

Britney Spears had quite the interaction today with L.A. County Commissioner Scott Gordon, and she dug a hole deeper than a Louisiana swamp.We're told Spears had a back and forth with the Commish that lasted approximately 40 minutes. She constantly interrupted him and at times was extremely sarcastic. At one point she started thanking the judge for what he had done, but her tone was heavily laced with disdain.

We're told the Commish explained to Spears how she had gotten to the point she's at -- why defying the various orders she was supposed to comply with raised concerns that she was not a responsible person. Spears didn't get it. She was at times contentious, argumentative and condescending.

We're told K-Fed's lawyer didn't object to her testimony, it was so bad. One description of today's testimony, pretty simple -- "Appalling.

tmz, source

"Kevin says she hit him several times during their marriage," says an insider of the latest allegation from Mr. Spears.In the custody case, the judge ordered Britney not to use corporal punishment on the boys.

"Kevin asked for that," says the insider, "because he's scared she'll hit the kids, too."A Brit insider refutes Kevin's claims, however, saying, "This is just another attempt to make Britney look like a bad mom."

I don't wanna read about it, I wanna see this mess! Remember that wonderful frying pan beating story? This all sounds like bullshit anyway. What's Life & Style gonna come up with next?

Britney Spears took a drug test this weekend and passed.

It was part of the court order requiring Britney to undergo testing. Sources say contrary to what they call "public perception," Britney has accepted the terms laid down by L.A. Court Commissioner Scott Gordon.

We're also told Britney is currently with her children and a parenting coach and all is going fine. She has visitation from morning till early evening. Spears also had similar visitation yesterday and last Saturday, and she has accepted the fact that the parenting coach, Lisa Hacker, will be watching and making suggestions.

As we first reported, Britney would not open the door for the children last Thursday because she didn't want anyone to tell her how to raise her kids. But as one connected source says, "It's all stabilized and it's all good."

tmz,

Kevin Federline Parenting Tips SNL skit

LMAO!!

"She checked into the Beverly Wilshire hotel. But early that morning, she realized it wouldn't be right to have her first visit with the boys in a hotel. She needed to see them at home, with their things around them."

"She and Alli [Sims] headed to Brit's Malibu house. They went to sleep as soon as they got there. Brit was up in plenty of time to prepare for the boys' visit at 10 a.m. But she waited, and waited, and they didn't show up. Alli's cellphone rang, and it was Kevin [Federline's] people, saying that the boys were going back to Kevin because she hadn't answered the intercom at the gate!"

"Brit didn't realize the intercom wasn't working. She begged them to bring the boys back. But they wouldn't. She was devastated that they wouldn't turn around."

Who the eff is Federsperm to be so effing shady? If Britney's intercom wasn't working, K-Fed's reps should have called Britney! And Britney shouldn't have been so patient, waiting on Federsperm to bring her kids.

Dayum! Daddy Dude is holding on tightly to his meal tickets. This is ridiculous. He should be driving back over to Britney's to drop the boys off as I type this. Don't be so heartless, douche bag. I can't stand this a-hole!

source, source

Britney Spears must hand over custody of her sons to Kevin Federline this week "until further order of the court," a judge ruled Monday after a closed-door hearing.

L.A. Superior Court Commissioner Scott Gordon gave no reasons in his written decision, issued after lawyers met with him in a private session requested by Federline's lawyer. The ruling says that Federline gets custody starting Wednesday.

But the ruling came after the filing of misdemeanor charges against Spears â€" hit-and-run and driving without a valid California license â€" and claims by her ex-bodyguard that she used drugs and is a danger to her children, Sean Preston, 2, and Jayden James, 1.

Gordon also previously found that Spears is a "habitual, frequent and continuous" user of alcohol and controlled substances, and ordered her to submit to random twice-weekly testing.

Another hearing is set for Wednesday.

I was in class when I received a phone call about this. We all saw this coming. Sucks to be Britney right now. If she wasn't a "habitual" drug user before, she's gonna start now!

UPDATE

Spears took the kids to the drive-thru at Carl's Jr. at 12:02 this afternoon and surrendered the kids to K-Fed's bodyguard three minutes later.

A source connected with the case says Spears was not focusing on the judge's order last month, and she may not have attended the parenting classes or performed the required drug and alcohol testing.

source, splash

*** Also, due to time restraints there won't be linkage today, but Snarky will be poppin' tomorrow. :)

Kevin Federline really hates Britney.Kevin Federline's lawyer, Mark Vincent Kaplan, is heading to LA Superior Court this morning to allege that Britney Spears was driving without a license over the weekend while her children were in the car!

Insiders say Kaplan will also bring up Brit's driving without a license on Aug. 6, when she was involved in an alleged hit-and-run motoring offense after crashing into a parked car in the San Fernando Valley.

Federsperm's lawyer also held a one-hour closed doors meeting on Sept. 28 discussing Britney's alleged hit and run offense. Britney reportedly hit a parked car and didn't report it to the cops.

Britney also has to take drug tests twice a week

"If she fails a drug test, the court might try monitored visitation, or no visitation until the tests come back clean. The court would be trying to protect the children."

Here I go defending Brit Brit again. Damn me! I was thinkin' about it... Britney isn't the mother of the year, we know this, but Kevin Federline is such a jerk.

Although Britney's worth $100 million, she decided to marry his broke ass and show him the finer things in life. He repaid her by leaving her alone all the time during her second pregnancy while he partied and promoted his rap cd. Then, she dumps his ass, and now he'll do whatever it takes to get custody.

So many other men wouldn't be putting Britney through all of this. He may genuinely be concerned about the well being of his children, but if Britney's convicted, she faces up to 6 months in jail for her hit and run and driving without a license. She picked the wrong sperminator and the end of her troubles is nowhere in sight.

source

As pretty much all of you know, a judge in the Britney and Kevin Federline custody batle has ordered that Britney must be tested for drugs and alcohol twice a week.

The judge thinks that "there is a habitual, frequent, and continuous use of controlled substances and alcohol by Britney."

The deets:

Custody remains at 50/50 for now

Britney and Kevin can't talk in public about each other or each other's family members

Brit, K-Fed and anyone else can't use corporal punishment against the kids

They must each complete the "Parenting Without Conflict" program and go to co-parenting counseling together

Britney and KFed can't drink alcohol or take controlled substances during the care of their kids or 12 hours before taking care of their kids.

This seems way too strict and it's obvious Britney's going to lose custody soon. Bitch went boozin' last night.

Reports of an FBI investigation into a plot to kill Kevin Ferderline are completely untrue -- however, an LAPD investigation was conducted in the past.

According to LAPD, the department opened an investigation into a threat on Federline's life nearly two months ago, but the case was closed due to insufficient evidence.

The L.A. spokesperson for the FBI blasted reports claiming that the the FBI ever confirmed anything about a K-Fed investigation saying, "The information on the Internet on these reports is not accurate. It did not come from the FBI at all."

I should have known. A story like this was a little too WTF to be true! Good job, Entertainment Tonight.

tmz

Entertainment Tonight has several reliable sources that the FBI and LAPD are investigating legitimate leads on a contract hit on Kevin Federline's life.

Multiple sources tell ET that the FBI made attempts to contact Federline to inform him of the potential danger. Sources within the FBI tell ET that this is the bureau's standard operating procedure when someone's life is threatened.

ET has been working this story for the past two months. When contacted, the FBI told us that the bureau cannot confirm or deny an investigation.

Okay, this shit isn't funny. Even I can't make a lame joke about this. I will be on top of this story as details emerge - if they emerge. We don't wanna see Kevin Federline killed. He's a never ending supply of jokes. The world needs more Federsperm!