Michael Phelps makes the Olympics exciting. The 26 year-old is only three medals away from receiving the most Olympic medals in history, but he tells 60 Minutes that he got lazy, depressed, and uninspired. Golden Boy was on a high after winning big in Beijing, but after his bong photo scandal, he began missing practice and no longer wanted to compete. Today, Michael is focused, training like crazy, and ready to compete in London. He's also ready to retire! Phelps explains that while he's traveled all over the world, he's only seen, "the hotel and the pool." He's real and remains just as likeable as he's always been. Make us proud in London, baby!

Michael Phelps 60 Minutes Interview

Oh, anonymous sources. You make the gossip world go 'round. You're so terrible to your famous friends and yet so awesome to people like me who thrive on hearsay and speculation. It seems like the more D-list the celeb, the larger the pack of money hungry vultures willing to sell their most intimate secrets to the highest bidder. For example, Britnny Gastineau might be banging someone famous, but she's still a virtual nobody, so of course her friends have been rummaging through her bathroom wastebasket in search of bloody tampons.

Yep, according to one of Britnny's "close friends" who, of course, declined to giver her name, the ex-reality star and current Michael Phelps slam piece is "late" and might be carrying Mike's flipper baby. "She is so late and very worried," the source told Radar Online. "She has an appointment with the ob-gyn on Wednesday in Beverly Hills." Britnny's anonymous bff also said that she recently bought a pregnancy test and apparently she went to a party over the weekend and didn't get hammered. Well, damn, I hope she already picked out a name, because she's obviously about ready to pop.

Since everyone seems to speculating about this, I'll join in and say I think it's BS. Between all the 'roids and pot smoking, Michael Phelps obviously shoots blanks. Now, that's how you start a wild rumor! And Mike and I aren't even friends.

Eleventy billion time Olympic gold medalist Michael Phelps is letting reality show has been Britnny Gastineau get all up in his Speedos. He's also trying to keep it a secret and doing a really sh!tty job of it.

Mike and Britnny were spotted together several times in LA this weekend and were reportedly getting "very cozy" together in public. Apparently, a TMZ photographer caught up with the pair yesterday and they immediately hauled @ss in opposite directions.

I say Mike's the one who wants to keep things on the down low, because why the hell would Britnny wanna keep it under wraps?! She's a D-lister at best and Mike is like American Jesus. Dude can take bong rips at parties, hang out with douche king Brody Jenner, and generally act like a cocky dick, and people still love him. Britnny gets known as Michael Phelps girlfriend, and she's up to C-list level, at least. On the other hand, if Mike goes public with the fact that he's in a relationship, the neverending ho train he's been riding since the Olympics is sure to slow down. Dude worked hard for that ho train!

Michael Phelps' Cadillac Escalade and a Honda Accord went boom around 9 p.m. last night in Baltimore.

Someone ran through a stoplight and Michael's SUV and the Honda collided and a third car, that was not moving, was hit as a result.

The po po says that the pot smoker was not intoxicated. Phelps was not given a field sobriety test because the cops determined that one was not necessary. Mikey then refused medical treatment and left in a "personal vehicle."

The woman in the Honda Accord complained of "head and arm pain," which means she intends on suing Phelpsy for big money.

At the NYC Omega flagship boutique opening yesterday, Michael Phelps was asked if he's dating Miss California Carrie Prejean, 21.

Phelpsy said,

“I’m single. My private life stays private.”

On Carrie's anti-gay marriage stance:

“That’s the cool thing about America - everybody has their opinion. I’m not saying I support her. I’m not saying I don’t support her.”

Everyone knows how to answer questions better than Miss California. Dolphin Boy doesn't wanna get involved in this shiz. And it's not like Mike can say that he supports gay marriage without idiots saying that he's gay. He can't say he doesn't support it without creating some drama, so he doesn't support Carrie and he doesn't not support her. Brillz.

Miss California Carrie Prejean is dating Olympian man whore Michael Phelps. Carrie's grandmother has confirmed the news. Whenever Michael is in town, Carrie is his booty call.

"Carrie and Michael have been out to baseball games and lunch.He always calls her when he is in town and they go out.”

“Carrie knows that he has dated a lot of girls but she enjoys going out with him. He's a nice guy and she likes him."

When Access Hollywood's Billy Bush tried to confirm Carrie's f*ckship with Phelpsy, Carrie said that it's "not appropriate" for her to answer that right now and that Michael is "a great man... You can call me on a later day and we can talk about that."

How many women is Michael dating right now? And is Carrie a virgin?! It's "biblically correct" to remain 'pure' until marriage and Phelps is a slut and I'm sure she's being a slut with him. So hypocritical.

I watched the Michael Phelps Matt Lauer Today Show interview on TV this morning and Michael's honesty was refreshing. He gives a great response at the end when Matt asks him what he'd like to say to his eight or ten-year-old fans. I also applaud him for not being a liar by saying he wasn't smoking herb. He neither confirms or denies it. Brilliant!

Matt Lauer, "I have to ask you: Were you smoking pot?"

Phelpsy,

"It was a bad mistake. I mean, we all know what, you know, what you and I are talking about. It's a stupid mistake. You know, bad judgment. And it's something that, you know, I have to, and I want to teach other people not to make that mistake."

Nothing conveys sincerity like reading from a teleprompter and looking sedated. When the Chris Brown and Rihanna scandal broke, I immediately knew that Phelpsy must be so happy. You know he is!

The Richland County Sheriff's Department has been taking a lot of heat from people in this country and all over the world. They want to know why Sheriff Leon Lott is going after Michael Phelps. Many are saying the sheriff should concentrate on more serious crimes.

Now it appears the case has expanded beyond Phelps' activities. Lott says the picture indicated a law was being broken in his jurisdiction. He said he couldn't ignore the violation just because Phelps is rich and famous.

Since investigators began trying to build a case, they've made eight arrests: seven for drug possession and one for distribution. These are arrests that resulted as the sheriff's department served search warrants.

We've also learned that the department has located and confiscated that bong. Sources say the owner of the bong was trying to sell it on eBay for as much as $100,000.

The owner, who wasn't even at the party, is one of the eight now charged.

Phelps is not one of those charged at this point, but the sheriff's department has strong evidence that matches the photo to the house on Blossom Street.

I wanna move to Amsterdam.

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In the past week Michael Phelps has gotten caught smoking a bong, been threatened to be arrested, lost his Kellogs endorsement, been suspended from USA Swimming for three months, and now he is threatening to quit swimming all together.

Michael Phelps recently told The Baltimore Sun (HOLLER! B-More) that he may walk away from swimming for good. This would mean he wouldn't swim at the 2012 Olympic Games. Jank face says:

"This is a decision of mine that I'm not going to make today and I'm not going to make tomorrow. It's going to require a lot of time and energy and a lot of thinking for myself - but also talking to Bob and talking to my family and just deciding what I want to do. If I decide to walk away, I'll decide to walk away on my own terms. If it's now, if it's four years, who knows. But it is something I need to think about and decide what I want to do."

Whatever Michael. I just think that the Phelpster loves the publicity. Last week he got caught choking on bongs, this week he is threatening to walk away from swimming. That's just stupid. He is young and could set an even bigger record, and therefore make more money. That is just bad business, and if Michael has done anything smart during his career its doing good business. This is just a ploy to get the attention off of the pot smoking and the subsequent mess that followed.

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