Scarlett Johansson
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I love ScarJo, but her voice is horrible. She sounds like a dying moose at best and her singing is mildly impressive. But the "24-year-old" actress will star in the Broadway revival of A View From the Bridge.

The show will run for 14 weeks in New York. It officially begins on Jan. 24, but preview performances will start on Dec. 28.

Scarlett Johansson will be playing a 17-year-old orphaned niece, which is strange considering that she sounds like a 35 year-old man. But when you're an orphan, life is rough and can force you to grow up a lil faster. It could work.

Scarlett Johansson brings her pale sexiness to the cover and pages of the November issue of Glamour magazine. The 25 year-old, cough, actress opens up on getting married to Ryan Reynolds last September. She also talks about her stage fright.

On Ryan:

"I never really thought about getting married – it just kind of happened. It seemed natural, the right thing to do. It was kind of a celebration of the time... I'm kind of making my own little family now, which is funny .It’s like a little bit of a tribe. You hope that a relationship makes you better, that you learn things about yourself."

On stage fright:

"I would love to work on Broadway, but I don’t know that it would manifest itself in musical theater ... I have terrible stage fright that I'd have to get over. It came on when I was a teenager, and I think it somehow sticks with you."

"I love to get ready for the red carpet, but being on it is very uncomfortable. It's so freakish and weird. I get flop sweats, dry mouth, heart palpitations, all-over panic!"

On rumors about her weightloss:

"There was this rumor mill cranking out stories that I had lost 14 pounds -- I could never lose 14 pounds. I can't look at somebody who is 6 feet tall and 120 pounds and say, I'm going to get that body. That's just never going to happen. You have to work with what you've got."

While the haters can keep hating, Scarlett Johansson keeps making it rain. She was the face of Louis Vuitton, she's been the face of Dolce & Gabbana, and she may be the face of other companies I can't think of right now, but I digress.

Here's Scarlett Johansson's ad for D&G's new fragrance, Rose The One. She has already been featured in its cosmetics ads.

Someone should make Scarlett the face of hair products. I can already picture ScarJo shaking her head like her hair's on fire for L'Oreal shampoo because she's worth it. Someone would have to do the voice over, though, cause Scarlett sounds like a homeless man when she speaks. She's kind of like Rihanna: confident enough to make anything sexy. Scarlett would even look hawt while promoting hemorrhoids cream.

According to recent reports, Lindsay Lohan and Megan Fox aren't the only women who don't like ScarJo, Gwyneth Paltrow hates on her too.

Gwyneth Paltrow and Scarlett Johansson acted together in "Iron Man 2" and Gwyneth was a snobby little buzzkill.

“Gwyneth is extremely cool at work. She’s just a step above professional, too snobby. Gwyneth is not friendly to anyone, and tends to make people feel awkward and uncomfortable. She wasn’t outright rude to Scarlett, she just didn’t ever speak to her. Gwyneth went out of her way to avoid Scarlett, and they had zero contact, at Gwyneth’s choosing.”

“Much of the crew didn’t mind hanging out with her husband, Chris, but if Gwyneth ever came around, they scattered! Chris is so chill and relaxed and she is just the opposite.”

ScarJo should be proud that so many women hate on her. That means that she's doing something right! And Gwyneth has always seemed completely unapproachable, but I have nothing against her. I don't mind a snob. Oh sh*t, what does that say about me?

I love Scarlett Johansson, but b*tch looks strange in her Elle France photospread. She looks like a congested alien with a lightbulb head.

In all fairness, ScarJo has dropped a lot of weight for her new movie and these pictures were obviously taken post weightloss. That's why she looks so hideous. Scarlett needs all of her curves. All of 'em. Thin is bad and if God blessed you with curves, and you don't look like Jelly Clarkson who carries all of her weight in her ass, face and thighs, then keep some weight on and keep those sexy curves!

Megan Fox's attitude reeks and she is effing stupid. Megan Fox is also a jealous idiot and she disses Scarlett Johansson in the new issue of Esquire magazine.

Megan says,

I don’t want to have to be like a Scarlett Johansson – who I have nothing against,” she says, “but I don’t want to have to go on talk shows and pull out every single SAT word I’ve ever learned to prove, like, ‘Take me seriously, I am intelligent, I can speak.’ I don’t want to have to do that. I resent having to prove that I’m not a retard – but I do. And part of it is my own fault.”

I’m just really confident sexually, and I think that sort of oozes out of my pores…It’s just there. It’s something I don’t have to turn on.”

How many major awards has Megan Fox been nominated for? None. How many has Scar Jo won? Some. Megan's totally intimidated by Scarlett's success.

Megan can't sound intelligent because she's too busy talking about being a tranny and how she's "really confident sexually," which is something Scarlett wouldn't do. ScarJo is naturally sexy and she doesn't insult others so that she can climb to the top. Scar Jo's so "confident sexually" that the men on the set of Scarlett's nude Vanity Fair shoot said she didn't give a sh*t that they were around and she's very comfortable with her body. Scarlett also doesn't remind us of her sexuality in every single one of her interviews. It's so obvious that Megan is "painfully insecure" just like she's said she is in the past.

Not all women are as catty or as brain dead as this dumb idiot tranny b*tch. Meg deserves her Z-list fiance Brian Austin Green. Okay, next.

Scarlett Johansson is shrinking and she doesn't like the rumors that she has lost her curves and is conforming to Hollywood's standard of beauty.

The petite beauty has fired back via the Huffington Post and says that losing 14 pounds is ridiculous and that would mean that she has lost 'both of her arms and a foot.' That was dumb, b*tch. At 5'3, 14 pounds really isn't that much weight unless you weigh barely anything to begin with.

ScarJo claims that she's thinner because of the movie she's working on and wanting to "look good in a latex catsuit." Fair enough. We'll all just have to wait and see if she gains weight when she's done with this, though, cause this letter reeks with denial.

While training for an upcoming film, I’ve come to this conclusion: chin ups are near impossible and lunges suck. There is no magic wand to wave over oneself to look good in a latex catsuit. Eating healthy and getting fit is about commitment, determination, consistency and the dedication to self-preservation.

While I’ve never been considered a gym rat, I have, in fact, worked up a sweat in the name of cardio before, and although I enjoy a grilled cheese as much as the next person, I combine the not-so-good foods I crave with an all-around balanced diet.

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Scarlett Johansson's amazing bubes have disappeared thanks to her 14-pound weight loss. ScarJo, a champion of healthy body images for females, has fallen victim to Hollywood's standard of bony ass bitch beauty!

A friend said: “Scarlett has always been happy with her curves, but recently she has been feeling pressure to lose a few pounds. She knows that she is up against tough competition from younger, prettier and increasingly skinner actresses.”

Scarlett previously insisted she loved her fuller figure and felt no pressure to diet. She said: “I don’t need to be skinny to be sexy.”

ScarJo is damn right, she "don't need" to be skinny because she "don't need" to lose her tits!

Scarlett's weight loss is due to eating a strict diet by Gwyneth Paltrow. She also began working out with her Iron Man 2 co-star in preparation for the movie. Sigh. She looks like a bobble head. The weight on her body is gone but her head remains massive. Not a good look.

Scarlett Johansson has lost weight and her magical breasts have been taken from us much too soon.

They were so young, so full of life, so perky! Although they leave a great legacy behind, they will be missed by millions of fans across the world. It is a sad sad day.

fs