The ladies who were fired from 'Real Housewives of New York City' have stayed mum about the situation, but one twosome is doing everything they can to stay on the show. According to E Online, Alex McCord and her freakish hubby Simon van Kempen are practically on their hands and knees trying to keep themselves on the series.

Simon and Alex are making their way to Bravo headquarters today to meet with Andy Cohen and show producers in a last-ditch effort to keep their pretty faces relevant on TV.

"Basically, they've been begging to stay on. They're not accepting that it's done."

Bravo doesn't want them on the show, but an insider says, "Andy would like them to pop up occasionally, whether on 'Housewives' or other programs on the network is what they're saying."

I don't watch the show every week, but anytime I've tuned in, I've never been impressed with Alex and Simon. They bring nothing to the table and need to move on. 

Photos: WENN

As we reported earlier this week, Jill Zarin, Cindy Barshop, Kelly Bensimon and Alex McCord have all been fired from The Real Housewives of New York City. Two of the ladies denied that they've been canned, which indicates that the news hit the blogoshphere before the stars themselves were informed.

Well, it's now official and two of the Housewives have issued public statements about getting axed. Naturally, they're pretending it's the best thing that ever could've happened to them.

“I view any change as an opportunity to learn and grow," said Cindy, by far the show's most boring cast member. "There are additional projects that I am considering. Stay tuned.” Those "additional projects" probably involve lots of crying and wine, but we'll definitely stay tuned.

As for the uber-obnoxious Alex McCord, she maintained her usual sunny demeanor, and we were thankfully spared any comments from her douche-tastic husband, Simon van Kempen. "After four seasons on Real Housewives of New York City, Simon and I are moving on," Alex said. "While it was their decision and not ours, we are in close communication with both Bravo and the production company about our next move, in addition to fielding outside offers.

On last night's episode of Real Housewives of New York City, Alex McCord's obnoxious husband, Simon van Kempen, generated a storm of controversy by allegedly cyber-bullying his wife's friends and cast mates. So were the ladies making a big deal out of nothing, or were Simon's "mean Tweets" really that bad?

A quick scroll through Simon's Twitter feed shows that dude likes to Tweet. A lot. And most of his Tweets are on the topic of how awesome he and his wife are and what fugly b!tches the rest of the Real Housewives are. For example,"It's ironic that the strongest & most secure woman on #RHoNY didn't need to take her spouse's last name." So, not only is Simon weirdly obsessed with what his wife's friends are doing and saying, he also doesn't know what "ironic" means.

But while the tone of Simon's Twitter is weird and needlessly dickish, he never reaches the point of full-on cyber-bullying. In fact, most of his posts are devoted to defending himself against accusations of cyber-bullying. A Tweet from last night reads, "They say there's no such thing as a victimless crime but Jill Zarin & Kelly Bensimon are doing their best at being crimeless victims."

So is Simon really a douche, or are the ladies just making a mountain out of a mole hill? Both, but at least it makes for good TV.

(Photo: WENN)

When you're fabulously wealth, every day is a celebration, so why not throw a huge party every freakin' day? And if you can pretend the party is actually an act of charity for a soon-to-be-broke friend, all the better! Despite having just hosted a lavish extravaganza for her daughter's birthday on last week's episode of Real Housewives of New York City, Ramona Singer is planning another bash this week to celebrate her own birthday. Being the fame whore PR wizard that she is, however, Ramona is telling people that the party is also a birthday celebration for her struggling drinking buddy, Sonja Morgan. So now, even if people don't care about celebrating Ramona's 50th year of guzzling pinot grigio (She started when she was five. True Story.) they still have to attend and bring two gifts out of respect for the nearly-homeless Sonja. Brilliant!

Speaking of people who make me sad, Cindy Barshop hosts a party (See? That's all these rich b!tches do!) to promote some kind of pube-removing product and Aussie douche lord Simon van Kempen takes the opportunity to confront Jill Zarin about some long-forgotten beef. He invites married woman Jill out to lunch to discuss their issues and while that might be normal in the land of  crocs and kangaroos, it's considered weird in this part of the world, so Jill shoots him down. Then, Simon puts his probably gay foot in his probably gay mouth and tells Jill to "watch out." Oh, snap. If this were Jersey, he would've gotten his @ss kicked, but because it's NYC, Simon finishes his champagne and leaves the party threatening to "mean-Tweet" his wife's friends. Really? I officially hate this dude.

Meanwhile, Sonja tries to set up an amateur porn scene by calling a plumber and working the phrase "my divorce" into every sentence while he pulls her Blackberry out of the toilet. Sadly, he leaves without showing her his plumber's snake, and she's stuck with a female feng shui expert who seems to have no interest in her advances. Feng shui expert? Flushing her Blackberry in a desperate attempt to get laid? It's good to see she's got her priorities straight in the face of bankruptcy and a multi-million dollar lawsuit.

Then it's back to the ladies hatin' on Simon, who deserves every ounce of the Haterade. Apparently, he's been "mean-Tweeting" the ladies for a while - and Jill in particular - in an attempt to further his career as...a mean-Tweeter? I'm not really sure what he stands to gain with his anti-Jill campaign, but it makes sense that it's part of an effort to make a name for himself on the Internet, and that he hopes his new found ce-web-rity (I just made that up; don't steal it) will translate into some cash. One would think he's playing a dangerous game, since his obvious cash grab could cost him his relationship with his wife, but Alex is 100% dick-whipped, so she seems to be cool with it.

The Real Housewives of New York City may be losing its two least-likable ladies. Alex McCord (a Housewife from day one) and Cindy Barshop (a season 4 replacement for Bethenny Frankel) are rumored to not be re-joining the cast after this season.

Alex was rumored to be on the chopping block in the past, as viewers have reportedly had an overwhelmingly negative response to her and her obnoxious, probably gay husband Simon van Kempen. Cindy, on the other hand, is pretty harmless, but also pretty damn boring, and producers may feel she's a poor substitute for fan-favorite Bethenny.

Whatever the reason, don't be surprised if Bravo tells these two Housewives to stay home next season.

Because it’s good to make friends with someone so that you can learn their business and then talk behind their back, Countess LuAnn and Kelly Bensimon are friends now.

The ladies go to a salon where LuAnn gets her nails done. Kelly says that she’s lonely and needs “some dating princess has to come and spread dust on me.” LuAnn tells her that she needs to trust people. Kelly also needs someone who will trust her, considering that she’s batsh!t crazy and all.

Alex McCord and Sonja Morgan meet up for lunch to have another unproductive discussion about how they’re going to pretend that they’re friends and “move forward.” Alex thinks she’s a pitbull now because she speaks up, but she cowers and tends to always say that issues she’s still uncomfortable with should suddenly be “dropped.”

We love Cindy Barshop, and so does Kelly. Kelly and Cindy meet up for the mandatory ‘Let’s-talk-about-our-co-stars-that-aren’t-present-because-we’re-contractually-obligated-to’ chit chat! Ramona Singer is brought up. Kelly doesn’t want to go to Ramona’s event, so she emails her (in front of Cindy) on her Blackberry, telling Ramona that she won’t make it.

Ramona is hitting the runway again and we almost cream our panties just thinking about it. Turns out that Ramona saw right through Kelly’s message. Ramona tells Sonja that she was hurt by Kelly’s email and she won’t support Kelly if she won’t support her.

And now it’s time for wine and strange men! LuAnn’s boyfriend throws a wine & speed dating event and every guy there is undateable, but some are f*ckable.

Kelly asks one of her dates to perform a scene from the movie Due Date. The scene requires Kelly’s stranger to tell her that he has cancer before asking her to marry him. He obliged and he sucked! More importantly, who tells an Oscar winner, let alone an aspiring actor, to perform a dramatic scene for them after they introduce themselves?!

Simon van Kempen throws his wife a birthday party. While walking to the party, Kelly tells Cindy that Ramona sent her a drunk text. Cindy says “I think people learn not to drunk text, uh, when you’re in college.” Cindy is 47 years old! She knows damn well that cell phones weren’t around when Ramona was in college and she may be unfamiliar with text etiquette; plus there’s nothing wrong with drunk texting! That’s how some of us get laid.

Simon’s birthday party is a picnic for her kids that Cindy loathes and Kelly also hates. Kelly said that “It was cold. It was cold. And it was REALLY cold” while Alex says “All of Simon’s plans fell into place perfectly, and this has been the best birthday yet.” We’re surprised Alex hasn’t filed for bankruptcy yet. She’s modeling because she obviously needs the cash, and her man couldn’t even afford a nice dinner? He took her a*s to the park and fed her a cookie on her special day.

Alex McCord of the Real Housewives of New York City's allegedly gay husband Simon van Kempen has put a debut single out and his crap is called "I Am Real." This song is grounds for divorce and it confirms that the man is queer. We could imagine hearing this mess playing in any gay club across America.

Like Kim Zolciak, Countess LuAnn and Danielle Staub, Simon also has an insatiable hunger for press and money. He's making fun of himself and the show, but was this necessary? We say yes. If Rebecca Black can make dozens of thousands each week because she isn't talented, Simon can try to do the same.

Simon van Kempen Sings I Am Real

It was just last week that I posted a story about Kim Zolciak saying that she is still in a sex-for-wigs relationship with Big Papa. But Us Weekly claims that Kimmy's a born again lesbian and she's pulling a Lindsay Lohan and dating a DJ.

DJ Tracy Young and Kim Zolciak have been bumping snatches for three months, according to Us magazine. The two stepped out together at the Blacks' Annual Gala in Miami Beach on Saturday.

Young remixed Kim's "Tardy for the Party" and was overheard saying, "We're really happy!" Can you imagine that? You're famous and if someone says "We're really happy" while they're in close proximity to you, it means you're engaged in a raging f*ckship with that individual. Ya gotta love it.

"Tracy broke up with her longtime girlfriend to be with Kim... They seem to be beyond happy with each other."

Last week, Real Housewives of New York star Simon van Kempen hinted to Us that Zolciak's sexuality would be a storyline on the Bravo reality series. "The rumor is that Kim Zolciak will come out this season," he told Us at the Season 3 screening party at Tenjune in NYC.

Less than half an hour ago, Kim tweeted the following: WOW...who the hell is Simon van Kempen? Talking abt me in US weekly. Give me a break...Get ur facts straights, Never met that man in my life

Why didn't Kim also say that she's dating Big Poppa and that she's straight?!!!

Isn't Simon van Kempen the gayest straight man you have ever seen? He is more flamboyant than drag queens. He is more feminine than all the women on The Real Housewives of New York City put together. He. Is. Gay.

Simon van Kempen, on the other hand, claims that he's a straight dude. Uh, yeah. Is that why many straight and gay men and women say that Simon's a closet case? My gaydar goes up in flames whenever I see Simon on The Real Housewives of New York City.

Simon is trying to cock block, though, and says he's hetero.

"If I was gay, I would be gay, but I'm not! I don't want to have sex with men! If other manifestations of gay means that I like to wear nice clothes and go shopping, then I guess that's fine! I love fashion, but I love my beautiful wife. That makes me gay? I mean, I've worn Speedos — therefore, I must be gay!" - If you're not Michael Phelps, than hells yeah!

"Hopefully, in season three we can get over that. I am Simon, I am not anything more than that. I'm just a loving husband."