Straight Fug News

Michelle Bombshell McGee and John Mayer should join white supremacist forces and f*ck the white power out of each other.

The "W" and the "P" above Michelle's knees stand for "White Power."

Jessee James' mistress posed for a Nazi-themed photoshoot. The swastika armband and backdrop was the photographer's idea, but Michelle was enthusiastic about it.

Michelle's ex-husband says she "makes the Nazi salute," and has a swastika tattooed on her stomach (not seen in these pics). In one photo the letter "w" is on Michelle's left leg, and the letter "p" on her right. Michelle tells people it stands for "white power."

This story just proves how intelligent bigots are! Michelle McGee also claims to be 24 years old and says she didn't know Jesse James and Sandra Bullock were together when she was having sex with him. At least she's honest about something - her white supremacy beliefs. So pathetic. I'm glad someone like Michelle can proudly put her name to self-hatred senselessly aimed at others cause everything she's about represents her cause sufficiently.

Michelle "Bombshell" McGee is one of the most unattractive women that I have ever seen, yet Jesse James found her attractive enough to risk contracting a fatal STD by "never" wearing a condom and having unprotected sex with her.

Anyway, Michelle McGee was actually raised Amish and left the church when she was 16. She then began making her skin a canvas by getting tattoos all over her body. McGee said she got her first tattoo when she was "15-years-old on my back, and kept it covered up." She said she "wants to be completely covered, I don't care."

It is women like Michelle that make lesbians looks really smart. You're a very popular and wealthy star, you remain so true to your heart and down to earth that you marry someone who's basically a Z-lister: Halle Berry, Britney Spears, Sandra Bullock. Then that Z-lister shows his gratitude by being a complete a*s! It's horribly sad.

Then there's the women who marry an A-lister: Elin Woods, Vanessa Bryant, Elizabeth Edwards,... and the dude still behaves like a complete a*s! Sometimes it's just worth it to call it a day and switch friggin' teams. Or better yet, if you're famous or famous by association, maybe you should just avoid marriage all together. Ugh.

Adam Lambert goes hard. His glitter has gone international as he promotes his debut album, For Your Entertainment. Adam said that he brought "Glamjuku" to Japan yesterday. Whatever it was, it was fabulous, darling, and we love that you just don't half ass anything.

Does Adam's makeup artist make house calls cause I'm feeling the eye makeup, sans the thick penciled in eyebrows.

Not only do Glambert's fans wait around in airports to greet him with posters and screams, they dress up like him! Make sure you check out the thumbnail of the group picture. Little Japanese children are rocking some thick eyeliner. Child abuse?! Heh. At least one thing's for sure: Adam Lambert is having a good time! I love that he seems to do what he wants to do and how he wants to do it; and for that reason I say 'All hail the Queen!'

Alright. So Hailey Glassman posted a picture of "Jon Gosselin's penis" on her Twitter page and the picture she posted was anything but a penis. It was like a deformed looking big toe. It was that small.

I admire any woman for having anything to do with Jon Gosselin's penis because the alleged picture has scared me for life.

Playgirl wants to capitalize on all of the Jon Gosselin penis talk, and the adult publication has made Johnny and his Johnny an offer. Heh. "Johnny" means condom in British, btw. Luv it.

Life & Style is reporting that Playgirl rep Daniel Nardicio has gone on record about what Playgirl is willing to pay Kate Gosselin's womanizing ex-husband. “We discussed it, and we’d offer him only $20,000. His star is extinguishing, and he’s not very [well endowed]. Honestly, It’d be more of a novelty than an actual sexy shoot.”

Does Playgirl really want to lose that many subscribers? I'm telling you, the alleged pic of Jon's peen is bad. Hailey has removed it from her twitpic account and I can't find it anywhere online, which is probably a good thing. Y'all have been spared.

There's no need for me to sugarcoat, Kelly Bensimon is about as sexy as Whoopi Goldberg. Her skin is greasy and looks like leather, there's like at least one foot between her sagging breasts, and her belly button on her Playboy cover has given its 2-week notice and is trying to walk outta the photoshoot.

Kelly Bensimon of the Real Housewives of New York City isn't very likable either. She reminds me of too many females in Orange County. I'm talking about ugly bitches who think they're cute. So sad! It's an epidemic.

Kelly is delusional. So delusional that she thought her cover and clinging to a pillow would be hot?! Go big or go home. If you're gonna do Playboy, show some friggin' skin or shut your face and stop attention whoring yourself out when you're too uncomfortable to reveal the goods anyway.

Comedian and actress Mo'Nique picked up a Golden Globe award for Best Supporting Actress on Sunday for her powerful role in Precious. But it's her hairy legs that everyone's still talking about.

Although Mo'nique gave one of the most moving and memorable speeches of the night, all anyone cares about is that Monique is a wilderness girl. The NY Daily news noted,

Mo’Nique showed off her unshaven gams on a 2006 appearance on “The View,” after prompting from Barbara Walters. Monique told the audience that she's revealing what a real leg looks like. "It’s too much in the morning, every morning, to shave, to cut, you got Band-aids baby.”

I first heard the term "wilderness girl" from this chick I met at bible camp when I was like 12. I told her that I hate shaving my legs and she was just like, "You could grow your hair out like a wilderness girl." Needless to say, I didn't take her advice. I HATE shaving cause I still cut myself and get razor burn, but best believe I only shave when I think I'm getting laid for special occasions. And occasions don't get any more special than the Golden Friggin' Globe Awards. The problem also stems from the fact that Mo'Nique is hairy as hell and she doesn't even wear nylons.

See what happened, Mo'Nique! We're talking about your legs more than your win. If you don't wanna shave, that's what wax, laser treatments, and everything in Ellen DeGeneres' closet is for, wilderness woman.

Nicole Kidman is making headlines for looking like she uses Lindsay Lohan's cocaine to cover the circles under her eyes and dab her nose.

While at the "Nine" movie premiere last night, photographers snapped pictures of the Oscar-winning actress with white powder all over her face.

This is why Hollywood is an ugly place to be. Nicole walked all the way to the red carpet without someone telling her that her face needed to be wiped off?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! B*tches be jealous. F*ck 'em, Nicole, you're still hot.

Rihanna had a big ol' "Rated R" tattoo that went down between her titty crack on the American Music Awards. Rihanna is addicted to getting tattoos so I was just like, 'typical,' b*tch is dumb.

But the tatt actually says "Rated R," the title of her crappy new album that drops tomorrow. Rihanna's outfit, on the other hand, was a sexy see thru ensemble that only she could pull off.

Why does Adam Lambert always look like he just got done giving a cactus deep throat? Eff collagen, this man needs some Vaseline injections.

Before American Idol, during the show's tapings, and after he lost, Adam Lambert's lips have looked so horribly chapped, they almost appear to be on the verge of peeling in some spots. You'd think that the "For Your Entertainment" queen who loves makeup would do something For His Lips and invest in all the right beauty products. I don't know what's goin' on here, but the excessive dryness doesn't make me wanna makeout with him. Such a damn shame. Your loss, Glambert!

Amy Winehouse is so stoked about her new boobies that she wants to go even larger. The tiny former crackhead went from a 32B to a 32D last month, and if she goes any bigger she's going to fall over from being off balance!

Ever since Amy bought herself a pair of new knockers, she's been proudly showing them off everywhere she goes. Friends say she's so happy with her boobies that she can't stop touching them and she's even considering butt implants.

"She thinks by having another op and bum implants that she will achieve her dream pin-up look."

Amy has always been hit in the face, but she had a cute little curvaceous body before she started hitting the pipe and snortin' the powder. She should start small and find someone to help her put on that black eyeliner evenly before she gets her butt plumped up. Amy just wants to upgrade her looks with surgery so she can sell her implants on Ebay later when she's broke and needs the cash to buy more crack.