Train Wrecks (Page 9)

I did some major research, went to one website to find out more, and read that Lindsay Lohan goes ape sh*t whenever she's unable to get a hold of Samantha Ronson.

Samantha went to Las Vegas without her to DJ at the Venetian for a promotional event for Justin Timberlake's line of tequila. Since JT hates Lindz, her firesnatch was not invited. This prompted the co-dependent crackhead to post the Tweets above cause she was unable to get a hold of Samantha.

Lindsay's tweeting began at 1:30 a.m. and went on until 7:30 a.m. this morning.

Sam's a lucky lady!

I really don't understand how Lindsay Lohan has gotten as many movie roles as she has. I'm sorry, but the girl is a horrible actress! She should have stopped trying the acting thing after Mean Girls.

Writer Allison Burnett is shopping around her novel "Undiscovered Gyrl" which is about a teen chick who blogs about her sex life. An executive had suggested Lindsay Lohan play the lead role but Allison wasn't interested in having Linds in the movie.

" [Lindsay] is a wonderful actress, but her fame and baggage would only work against her."

They need to give Lindsay a role about a girl who started out as a great actress when she was little, but has turned into sh*t as she got older. Now that's something she could handle! Throw a little hard partying with cocaine and lesbian drama into the film and she just might win an Oscar.

Amy Winehouse was found not guilty of punching dancer Sherene Flash. What? I was hoping they would send Wino away but I'm gonna have to keep dreaming.

Amy was charged with punching Sherene after a charity ball last September. Amy said she's not tall enough to punch Sherene in the face. Um, there's only a 5 inch difference in their height so I'm not sure why she thinks she wasn't tall enough to slap the ho.

Winehouse said she had felt intimidated when Flash "lunged at me and put her arm around me," and had only meant to push the other woman's arm away. "I was scared," Winehouse said Thursday. "I thought 'People are mad these days, people are just rude and mad, or people can't handle their drink.' "

She also said that at "5 foot 2½ or 5 foot 3"  and wearing ballet pumps, she was too short to have hit the woman in the face. Flash is 5 foot 7 inches tall.

I can't believe the judge believed that shiz. When you have 10 months to get your story straight, it's easy to make up some good bull, but the too short excuse is just retarded!

Amy Winehouse wants to launch a perfume line with the help of her dad, Mitch.

They are hoping to land a deal worth $750,000 to bottle up her stench.

"Mitch is keen to license Amy's name to a perfume house. He has been in talks with manufacturers and contacted PR firms for advice. They want it to reflect her style with a classic smoky 1950s look and smell. Amy is keen to expand her brand and wants to latch on to the celeb perfumes bandwagon while she can."

A classic 1950s smoky look and smell? More like a 1950s smoke with a tiny hint of crack residue and foul body odor. Top it off with a dash of blood from cutting herself and a drop of toe funk from those flats she always wore, and she's got a winner!

More info is coming out about the days leading up to Mischa Barton's hospitalization.

Sources say Mischa was on a three-day coke bender and her friends call the po-po because they were afraid she may kill herself. The hard partying is taking its toll on her looks and she's showing her boobies in public.

"She's running out of money and can't find love, so now she is looking for a good time to escape her misery. She is on a downward spiral. She is a mess. She is a suicidal, uninsurable mess."

Photographed Tuesday at an LA hotel, the once-skinny Barton (above) looked bloated and almost unrecognizable. A guest at the hotel said Barton seemed to be stumbling around poolside and at one point was topless.

A source believes it will take some time before Barton bounces back, saying: "She is a tortured and troubled person. You can survive a bad review, but when you don't show up for the premiere of your new film, it's not a good sign of where your career is heading."

First stop is the psych ward, her next stop will be rehab!

I guess Mischa Barton had a little more than a tooth ache when she was taken from her home the other day.

New reports say Mischa was taken to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center and is under a psychiatric hold. Friends feel like Mischa has been out of control for while.

"She has been dealing with a lot of personal issues. I don't know if she really ever gave up some of the bad habits that had gotten out of control a couple years back."

Everybody knows Mischa's a pot head and has been for quite some time. She was arrested for DUI and pot possession back in 2007 and was put on three years probation. Last week we reported that Mischa's friends were worried about her health because of her binge drinking and greasy food diet. I think it was her pals' way of trying to make the public aware that Mischa was in bad shape and needed help. Here's to hoping Mischa gets better and jumps off of the crazy train.

Gentlemen line up cause it's your lucky day! Amy Winehouse is officially single again! Black Fielder-Civil filed for divorce earlier this year because Amy was sleeping around and he found living with her "intolerable."

A judge read out the divorce decree for "Fielder-Civil B. v Winehouse A.J." along with those of other estranged couples at a brief Family Court hearing. Neither 25-year-old Winehouse nor Fielder-Civil, 27, was in court Thursday. The divorce becomes final after six weeks and a day.

This is now a national holiday in my book. I dig Amy's music and it was a shame to watch her fall apart the way she did when she got with Blake. Congratulations Amy, but don't f*ck up again!

Lindsay Lohan is so messy that the cops thought that someone broke into her crib and left a mess. In reality, dirt is a cokewhore's best friend, and having your house look like a few tornadoes ripped through it is how Firesnatch likes to keep her space.

On Tuesday, Los Angeles police were notified that someone tripped an alarm at the actress' house around 3 p.m. in Hollywood.

Turns out, the mess likely belonged to Lohan.

Police asked themselves, "Is it normally like this, or did the intruders do it?" Los Angeles police Officer Karen Rayner told the Associated Press.

LAPD cops are sooooo bored these days. Don't they have another celebrity DUI arrest they should be making? Geezus.

My least favorite talented trainwreck Amy Winehouse performed at a "comeback" concert at the St. Lucia Jazz Festival on Friday. Watching this video was torture and I wanted to press pause within a few seconds, but I watched it for you, all, so that I could comment.

Wino adjusts her weave, does her crackhead shake, paces the stage and erratically dances around and "sings" in a language that loosely resembles English. I want a refund just for watching this.

It's been two years in the making, but Lindsay Lohan is returning to her slutty heterosexual roots. Dina Lohan dropped SamRo's ex off at Bardot last night at 12:30 am where witnesses say Blohan “was drinking Jack and Cokes." Lindsay also tried to get herself some peen.

Lindsay was flirting with a member of the Bardot staff — and it's not the first time she’s fluttered her eyelashes at him. On a previous visit to Bardot a few weeks ago.

“Lindsay had her friend ask him for his number. The guy wasn’t interested at all, but gave her his business card.”

On Monday night,  Lindsay once again tried to make small talk with this same gentlemen, and that she received the same indifferent response from the object of her affection.

Someone's rusty, but it's good to know that the firesnatch is warming itself up again.

Final post of the day, all. There won't be Hot Links either. There's a shortage of good stories plus its been a long day. <3