WTF News

Who wants to join me in taking Kevin Federline hostage and cutting off his nuts with a plastic knife? Fat boy has done the unthinkable and knocked up his girlfriend, Victoria Prince.

Sources say Victoria suspected she was prego after a trip to Vegas in mid-October and confirmed it after taking a home pregnancy test. Kevin isn't thrilled to be a daddy for the fifth time, and word on the street is that Britney Spears is not a happy camper about the pregnancy either.

"Britney never wanted Kevin to have another child unless it was with her," revealed a source. "She desperately wants to have a baby girl, and she had hoped Kevin would be the dad."

Beggars can't be choosers! If Britney doesn't want him to have children with some other dumb ho who is stupid enough to allow his sperm in her vagina, then she should have had him fixed while they were together. She could have put some of his little swimmers on ice until she was ready to have another. And why does she want to have more kids with him anyway? 

Michael Jackson wasn't into golden showers, but he did like to whip his wang out and pee in front of people. Maybe that explains the crotch grabbing he did during his performances! He was wishing he could just release the trouser snake and pee in front of his fans.

Michael's doctor and old pal Arnold Klein says Michael had pee'd in front of him along with numerous other people including the child who accused Michael of child molestation.

Dr. Klein insists Jackson did not molest the boy, and says the reason he could describe Jackson's genitals is because Jackson liked to pee in front of other people. Dr. Klein said Jackson thought it was funny.

Arnold also said Michael would pee in a cup while at Klein's home in front of many people including children. My guess is Michael was packing a monster in his pants and wanted to show others there was one area on his body that hadn't been mangled with plastic surgery. At least he wasn't p*ssing on people to mark them as his territory.

If Chidi Uzomah wants to be the next American Idol, this is not the best way to score a record deal.

Chidi attacked Ryan Seacrest's security guard last month outside a hospital in the OC. Chidi had a knife on him at the time and today he was also carrying a knife when he was arrested in the E! lobby. Ryan was working in the building at the time of his arrest.

The alleged stalker is 6'4 and 200 lbs. Gaycrest is only like 5'9.

Chidi pled guilty last month in the Orange County hospital incident to three misdemeanors. The judge placed him on three years probation and ordered him to stay away from Ryan.

As a stalker of my ex-boyfriends and current crushes, I would never stalk a celebrity. I like to think that what I do is normal, sane, healthy even, but this Chidi muthafucka is sick and disturbed!

You can leave it to Family Guy to be offensive and controversial. The hit Fox show had an episode that aired late last year that included a joke about Laura Bush killing "a guy" when she was only 17 years old.

Laura was allegedly driving a car that hit another car at a nearby stop sign. The man in the other car was Michael Douglas, 17, who was Laura's boyfriend at the time. After spending days at Midland Memorial Hospital, Michael died due to neck breakage.

Michael was a popular athlete at Laura's high school. At the time of the accident, Laura was allegedly driving 50 MPH although the speed limit was 55 MPH. Some speculated that she was drinking at the time of the accident. However, police agencies said that Laura was not driving.

According to Police report that released in 2000, Laura was not held responsible for killing the man.

While talking to Associated Press in 2000, Laura admitted, “It was terrible and much terrible accident.” I can realize it being a mother.

Interesting. R.I.P.

Angelina Jolie was learning the art of becoming a home wrecker when she was just a teenager. In a new biography about little miss plump lips, sources say Angelina had sex with Marcheline Bertrand's boyfriend when she was 16. Marcheline just happens to be Angelina's mother. Pretty gross, right?

That's why it was easy for Angelina to hook Brad Pitt, because she was already starting her career of humping other people's men when she was a teenager. Dirty wh*re!

"Marcheline had a live-in boyfriend whom she was very much in love with, but Ange slept with him when she was 16 and barely out of school. Her mother found out and ended her relationship with the man."

Angelina just told her brother about the affair a few weeks ago and "even he turned on her." Apparently not many people trust her any more and can you blame them? When you have no problem banging your mom's dude, you're seriously f*cked in the head.

I never knew Adam Lambert was so pretty! I'm a Glambert fan, so I won't go into detail about his album cover for his debut disc, For Your Entertainment.

I love his eye makeup, so hot. And in case you didn't know, Adam Lambert is gay. I really love how out and proud he is. He's a great role model and I luvs him. That is all. It's all about the music, not the shirtless over the top drag queen cover from outer space.

Noah Cyrus is only nine years old, but she's already dressing like a slut. This isn't the first time that Noah has paraded around in her boots with heels and worn makeup, but she might as well be runnin' around in a thong, cause if she bends over, you're gonna see some booty cheek for sure.

Miley Cyrus' little sister showed up at Jamie Lee Curtis' Halloween party over the weekend dressed like some kind of dominatrix witch slut or something. Her parents should be ashamed. When you look like Noah, ya gotta make up for it in the personality or good body department, and allowing her to dress like this now is only teaching her that she should show skin.

Although I find her outfit repulsive, Noah is already prepped for costume changes and the stage. The last thing I could do when I was nine, or even today, is walk around in heels without landing on my hands and knees. I'll give her credit for that, but damn those heels must start hurting within an hour!

You're looking at behind the scenes footage of Pamela Anderson on set of her latest porno, Pammy Luvs Plushies. You've heard of plushie porn haven't you? It's when freaks dress up in animal costumes and get their groove on. You should see my meth addicted chipmunk prostitute costume, it's fabulous!

All kidding aside, Pam is promoting the anti-seal hunt campaign in Toronto. Doing some plushie porn wouldn't be such a bad thing for Pam to do since she's going broke! That dude in the costume has to feel like the luckiest man on earth having Pam cuddle up to him for photos. The costume shop owners are probably pissed about the sticky spot that guy left inside their fuzzy seal outfit.

Adam Lambert has posed in a racy Details magazine photoshoot that is basically pornographic.

The pictures are under such lock and key that every site I tried to find 'em on has since removed them per request. SO, if you wanna see Adam partaking in grown folk's business with a naked woman, ya gotta click our link and check 'em out before they're gone!!...  Continue Reading...

Marge Simpson's 'naked' Playboy spread has got everyone curious. Is she shaven, or does she trim? Does she got a badonkadonk, or is she flat-a*sed like Paris Hilton?

Did she have breast implant surgery, or do her girls come natural? The questions are endless, and we've got some answers... well maybe just one answer. It looks like Marge is naturally well endowed, and she looks great!

Marge's Playboy issue is on newsstands now.