WTF News (Page 6)

Oh, my God. I really need to meet him and mess up his marriage. And mess up mine, too... Have you seen his hands? I'm sorry, but I'm a big hand freak, and those hands could wrap around you twice."

Malin Akerman isn't being totally serious, but she does have a huge crush on Barack Obama. Watch out Malin, or Michelle Obama and her guns for arms will pound your ass in the ground. Nothing's hotter than a good cat fight between chicks with great hair.

We knew these types of photos would come out once there was speculation of what really happened between Tila Tequila and Shawne Merriman.

Tila was on her way to meet with investigators from the San Diego District Attorney office to talk about her incident with Shawne. She has some serious bruises on her arms! Or is that make-up? Nah, I believe they're real, but what a coincidence the paparazzi were around to snap a bunch of pics of her banged up arms.

The paps even asked Tila if she would forgive Shawne for what happened and her response was 'I don't know'. How can you forgive someone who beats the sh*t out of you? Unless you're holding a gun to his head and about to pull the trigger, or a knife to his penis and threatening to cut it off, no dude has the right to physically harm a chick.

Ellen DeGeneres will be replacing Paula Abdul on American Idol. So what exactly are Ms. Degeneres' credentials?

She says, "I have not missed one episode," she loves to dance, and she frequently sings off key. I smell some sh*t and it came from a bull, y'all, cause this is some straight bullsh*t!

After the audition rounds, which will feature celebrity judges, Ellen will fill Paula's seat beginning in January.

At yesterday's taping of the Ellen DeGeneres Show, Ellen announced, "I've been dying to tell everyone. It's just been so hard to keep it a secret and we just finally got the OK and I'm so excited. It is going to be so much fun."

Music is not this woman's area of expertise and she's probably going to try to be funny. American Idol isn't the right fit for Ellen's snarky sarcastic genius. She thinks that judging will "be so much fun," but how fun will it be when she doesn't have an ear for music? And to think that Paula couldn't get the money that you know Idol will be paying Ellen. I guess this is a lame attempt for Idol producers to spike ratings and prove that they're not sexist. Can I vote Ellen off the show?

Check out the video of Ellen talking about being the new judge after the jump!

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Check out Kim Kardashian as Barbie in the Australian magazine, Kurv. They should have pushed her head over and had Ken more centered cause Kim just looks strange!

I'm glad she never went any blonder than she did with her hair cause she doesn't look right with this platinum crap she's rocking on the cover. The other pics are way better than the photo above.

And that just scares me. Lindsay Lohan is the last person I would want holding my kid for fear my child would be coked up just from touching her face.

I pray she never pops out any kids of her own because she would use them for tabloid attention and some cash, cause she's not making movies worth getting paid decent money for. I hope the parents disinfected their kid after Lindsay gave it back.

Aubrey O'Day fell out of the dumb*ss tree and hit every branch on the way down. Aubrey started off her smart comments, shown in the video below, by stating she met and worked with Fidel Castro while in Cuba and went on to say he and Hitler are brilliant men.

Realizing she made a fool of herself, Aubrey released the following statement:

"Murderers and dictators generally are some of the smartest people out there - they just use their brain power for evil purposes. I don't condone any of their evil behavior, but I was asked about their intellectual firepower...and in my opinion you can't have a low IQ and wreck (sic) that much havoc on the world. What Hitler succeeded in doing, was deplorable...And I hope we never see such an abusive use of power again."

She never worked with Fidel either. In college she did a Semester At Sea and took part in a half day seminar about Castro. The girl needs to stick with getting naked in Playboy rather than talking politics.

I wasn't surprised to hear that Michelle Duggar, 42, is pregnant again. I was waiting for the announcement, actually.

Pregnancy is what this woman does, and she does it without taking much of a break between children. The family of 18 resides in Arkansas and parents Michelle and Jim Bob have given all 18 kids a first name that begins with J.

Michelle makes Nadya Suleman look responsible and sterile. I'm hoping her uterus will come right out with the baby! Or become severely damaged during this pregnancy. Just being honest.

DJ AM gets candid with MTV for his new reality show, Gone Too Far.

DJ AM had been sober for 11 years before he died of an alleged overdose last week. Before his tragic death, he had helped many people with their own sobriety for years. His efforts were mostly unknown until he finally joined forces with MTV in a new show that would give us all a glimpse at Adam Goldstein - the mentor, and not just DJ AM - the talented DJ.

These videos are short, interesting and incredibly eerie.

MORE INFO:

Details on Adam Goldstein's troubled past

Ex-girlfriend Mandy Moore issues statement and Paris Hilton reacts

Adam's life in pictures

When it comes to Jon Gosselin, b*tches recognize pimpin' when he walk into the do!

Although it was a ridiculous 115 degrees in Las Vegas on Saturday, thousands of people showed up to Jon Gosselin's pool party.

"Moments" after Jon's gut made an appearance at MGM Grand's Wet Republic, several females from the VIP area approached him and hung out in his cabana while he ordered Vueve Clicquot Champagne, water and trays of food.

During the two hour douche festival, Jonny was spotted taking phone numbers and mixing drinks for the hot girls in bikinis. After the party, Jon ate at Craftsteak with his mother and friends and later checked out Cirque du Soleil's Ka.

Jon's event drew a crowd of 2,000 people who danced to rock, hip hop and house music.

There was one chick at the bash who shouted out "Team Kate." If she was hot, I'm sure Jon would try to get her number too.

This brings a whole new meaning to getting the monkey off your back! American Pie actor Jason Biggs was attacked by a monkey while on vacation on the island of Gibraltar.

Luckily, Jason had a few friends with him who helped spank the monkey before it did any serious damage.

"Jason’s traveling companions managed to fend the beast off and Jason thankfully wasn’t seriously hurt, just shaken up," a source told US Media. Biggs had been visiting the island, located between Spain and Morocco, with his friend and "American Pie" co-star Eddie Kaye Thomas when they came upon the wild animal, one of Gibraltar’s mascots.

The pair had planned the trip to celebrate their famous movie’s 10th anniversary. As a result of the attack, the actor ended his vacation and immediately returned to the U.S.

You know you're having a crappy day when a wild ape attacks you while your on vacation, but I can see how an ape can confuse Jason as one of their own kind. Jason should be happy the little hairy guy didn't start flinging poo at him, and try to get him to take part in some hot monkey sex!