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It was months ago when rumors surfaced that Nicole Richie was pitching a television show to various networks. Nicole Richie's sitcom, staring the malnourished mother of two, has been picked up and will debut on ABC. The show is currently untitled but will be written by 30 Rock writer Daisy Gardner!

Nicole said that she's "so excited" to announce the news and that she'll be starring and producing her sitcom. "The story revolves around a young, modern and professional woman who must balance her business and family relationships. She must deal with, and navigate the many ideas of what a woman's role is: modern vs. traditional.

Richie claims that the women she's been interacting with got her creative juices flowing.

"Lately, I have been surrounded by many different women of all ages and walks of life. It amazes me to watch and observe how many different ideas there are about what a woman's role should be in this era. I've taken these fascinating ideas, and compiled them into something that I think will be very special (and funny!)..."

I don't even recognize Nicole Richie anymore. Remember the days when she was whoring out, partying with Paris Hilton, and getting arrested? Ya gotta love that Paris is too busy servicing men while her former sidekicks, Kim Kardashian and Nicole Richie, moved past the party girl image and continue to outshine her.

Serena Williams will shove a ball down your throat and she has to pay for threatening to do so, too.

Serena Williams was fined a record-breaking $82,500 for her courtside outburst during the U.S. Open in September. Jeff Tarango was fined $48,000 in the 1990s.

She will also be on a probationary period through 2011. Williams -- whose career prize earnings top $28 million -- will be suspended from the following U.S. Open, and hit with higher fines, if she has another incident during her probation.

Serena already lost the match due to her bad behavior, so this has got to sting, at least just a little.

I'm not questioning Kim Kardashian's health. I'm questioning her motives. Kim Kardashian and Khloe Kardashian have become entirely obsessed with their figures ever since they signed up to be QuickTrim spokeswhores.

Kim Kardashian has posted tweet after tweet and picture after picture of herself in lingerie and bikinis, talking about her body. Who knew that the woman who was always praised for being thick would lose so much weight?

Kim says, "I really feel like I have reached my fitness goal and now I am toned, fit and at a healthy weight and I just need to keep it up!"

On Thanksgiving, she Twittered that she was planning to hit the treadmill while the food was in the oven. "No excuse for getting lazy during the holidays," she wrote.

Kim looked fine before her weightloss, but I'm not so sure she knows that?

Brittany Binger is the 22 year-old model girlfriend of Cleveland Indians baseball player, Grady Sizemore.

Grady is better looking than Brittany, but she has a great body. Brittany was Playboy magazine's Playmate of the year in June 2007. She's also close friends with Kendra Wilkinson and has a supporting role on her show, Kendra.

Grady sent sexy pictures of himself to Brittany Binger and the pictures were "stolen" and leaked. And when I say "stolen" I mean Brittany sent them out to her girlfriends and the pictures got out to the media. Did Brittany even care if the pictures went public? I know I wouldn't. It's not like Grady is completely nude and the woman has plenty of bragging rights.

Cleveland Indians center fielder Grady Sizemore says that the pictures of him doing the classic mirror sexy shots were "stolen" from his girlfriend Brittany Binger's email.

This weekend Grady said,

"These pictures were stolen illegally from my girlfriend's e-mail. It's now a legal matter that is under investigation. I can't say anything more."

You know what? I'm so happy that the pictures were stolen because Grady is damn hawt! As much as I say folks should not take scandalous pictures of themselves and send them to their partners, Grady makes me rethink my stance.

Thank you!

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Tareq and Michaele Salahi are planning an exclusive tell-all interview that may earn them six-figures. The interview will allegedly be taking place on CNN.

The Salahis crashed the White House state dinner honoring Indian Prime Minister Manmohan Singh last week. They are trying to get a spot on Bravo's The Real Housewives of D.C. and they had a film crew filming Michelle and Tareq as they got ready to meet Mr. President.

Michelle posted the following message on her Facebook page: I was honored to be invited to attend the First State Dinner hosted by President Obama & the First Lady to honor India.

This woman is sick!

The aspiring socialites are no strangers to controversy as they have been named, either as defendants or plaintiffs on 16 different lawsuits. One of their businesses is in bankruptcy. Tareq has even sued his own mother.

The shameless fame hungry couple won control of Oasis Winery from Tareq's mother in 2007, but ran the establishment into debt. Oasis filed for bancruptcy in February, citing the IRS and American Express among the unpaid creditors.

Tareq and Michaele may face serious criminal charges for their publicity stunt. Although they're in debt, maybe talking with CNN isn't the best idea.

Is it just me or am I on a Rachel and Tiger roll here today? Bare with me. So far it's a slow news day, but I'll get off of these two for a while. Maybe.

Rachel Uchitel was determined to sleep her way to the top. Rachel's snatch has been linked to married actor David Boreanaz and New York Yankee players Derek Jeter and A-Rod.

In 2004, she married Wall Street trader Steven Ehrenkranz but split after four months. She was also engaged to investment banker Andy O'Grady, who later died in 9/11 attacks.

As for reports that her affair prompted Woods' mysterious car crash Friday, she said: "I don't understand why anyone would think this is anything to do with me."

Rachel is reportedly "overwhelmed" with being the center of a sex scandal and has hired celeb attorney Gloria Allred. Happy holidays, whore.

Awwww. The art of being vague. When one leaves many gaps in a statement, the other party often walks away more confused than before. It's a beautiful thing.

From the days of having my parents ask me if I'm smoking or doing bad things, non-Christian things, whatever, and looking them dead in the eye and denying it, I think I could pull off some stunts and deny deny deny whatever it was I did, and with such Carrie Prejean-like conviction, that you'd think I was a saint.

On to Tiger Woods and his carefully worded statement posted on his website on Sunday:

As you all know, I had a single-car accident earlier this week, and sustained some injuries. I have some cuts, bruising and right now I’m pretty sore.

This situation is my fault, and it’s obviously embarrassing to my family and me. I’m human and I’m not perfect. I will certainly make sure this doesn’t happen again.

This is a private matter and I want to keep it that way. Although I understand there is curiosity, the many false, unfounded and malicious rumors that are currently circulating about my family and me are irresponsible.

The only person responsible for the accident is me. My wife, Elin, acted courageously when she saw I was hurt and in trouble. She was the first person to help me. Any other assertion is absolutely false.

This incident has been stressful and very difficult for Elin, our family and me. I appreciate all the concern and well wishes that we have received. But, I would also ask for some understanding that my family and I deserve some privacy no matter how intrusive some people can be.

Sounds like Tiger is a sacrificial pussy-whipped idiot who's trying to avoid another beatdown from his "courageous" wife, Elin. What a dork.

Tiger Woods Swedish wife Elin Nordegren is a crazy b*tch who needs to be charged for domestic violence.

Elin allegedly lost her shiz over rumors that Tiger Woods was sexting and sexing Rachel Uchitel.

Tiger said that Erin confronted him about Rachel and an argument ensued. Erin then scratched his face up.

It was then Woods beat a hasty retreat for his SUV. Woods says his wife followed behind with a golf club. As Tiger drove away, she struck the vehicle several times with the club.

You all know the story by now. Tiger's SUV crashed into a fire hydrant and then hit a tree. Elin will forever look like a crazy a*s bitch now and I'm glad. She sucks!

Chelsea Clinton, 29, is engaged to her hottie boyfriend Marc Mezvinsky, 31.

Marc has known Chelsea for years and they have been in a "longtime relationship." No dates, all. Chelsea and Marc announced their engagement by sending out the following email to their family and friends and family on Friday:

"We're sorry for the mass email but we wanted to wish everyone a belated Happy Thanksgiving! We also wanted to share that we are engaged! We didn't get married this past summer despite the stories to the contrary, but we are looking toward next summer and hope you all will be there to celebrate with us."

I can't wait for the wedding pics. Congrats!