Tag Archives: Dina Lohan

Dina Lohan: Drunk and Disruptive at Charity Event

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With a mother like Dina Lohan it’s clear to see why Lindsay is such a mess. Mama Lohan showed up to the Rock Art Love auction event in NYC this  week and got completely hammered. Sources say Dina appeared to be  bidding on art throughout the auction, but it turns out she was just  drunkenly flailing her arms.

Drunk Dina Lohan 2013

Seems Dina was drunk by the end of the  dinner that preceded the auction and when it came time for the main event she could not keep it together.

My question is why was she even there? Who invited her, we all know  that the Lohans are kind of broke right now (well, Lindsay is, Dina is just riding her coattails).

Anyway, at one point the woman in running the auction had to remind Dina that if her hands went up it meant she was bidding.

It’s seriously no surprise that Lindsay is the way she is and I’m  starting to think that maybe MIchael Lohan is actually not all that bad, which scares me.

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Dina Lohan: Drunk Interview on Dr. Phil?

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Like drunken train wreck mother, like drunken train wreck daughter, Dina Lohan appears to be intoxicated during her interview with Dr. Phil. Dina's explosive exclusive airs this Monday.

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One of the weirdest moments occurs when Dina tells teases Dr. Phil by telling him: “You’re like in your little tie, your little shoes, like.” Michael Lohan is slamming Dina of course, as if he's much better. Jump in to catch one half of Lindsay Lohan's crazy parents in action! I think Dina's on something, I don't know if it's alcohol though. She's more coherent than I am when I'm drunk.

 

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Ali Lohan is Not Too Thin, According to Dina Lohan

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Ali Lohan looks dangerously thin, but her mom Dina Lohan makes it sound like we have the problem. Dina argues that Ali’s completely fine. Dina said that she “doesn’t read any of the rubbish” that’s printed about Ali’s weight. Oh snap. I guess she’s British now too.

Ali Lohan sucksAli Lohan thin

Ali before and after her dramatic weight loss

Dina adds that she “would never condone plastic surgery at such a young age,” and that her daughter is awesome, as if that means she’s healthy?! “Ali is a wonderful person and an amazing soul.”

In a recent interview with Page Six magazine, Ali said that “she’s always had a fast metabolism and is able to eat what she wants, from scrambled eggs with American cheese and hot sauce to Nutella.”

It really doesn’t matter what you eat. If you’re sick, you’re sick, which is exactly what Ali is IMHO.

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Lindsay Lohan Heads Back to Rehab

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…and the coke dealers wept. As part of a last-ditch effort to avoid going back to the clink, Lindsay Lohan checked herself back into rehab and is rumored to be staying there until her October 22nd court date. Like most things involving LiLo, the whole situation is even more crazy-cakes than it initially sounds.

That’s Linds pretending to read a self-help book on her last night of freedom. She probably thinks this picture says, “I’m totally serious about getting sober, you guys” *wipes coke boogers on sleeve*. What it actually says is that she thinks we’re all retarded. Who the hell reads in front of a sunset without noticing the photographer 3 feet away? Well it’s better than having your picture taken while you’re shooting heroin.

Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson with cigarette

Mom of the year Dina Lohan has already started trying to get a conservatorship over Lindsay, because, ya know, Linds won’t be able to spend her own money for a while, so someone else should, right? A conservatorship is basically a legal ruling that you’re mentally 12 years old. Lindsay might soon join Britney Spears on the very short list of adult millionaires who are too effed up to run their own lives.

Oh, and the book Lindsay’s reading? It’s about getting a good night’s sleep. I could probably help her with that – stop doing piles of blow! There, you can put the book down, now. Good luck in the ‘hab you crazy, crazy coke vacuum.

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Dinal Lohan Felt Ambushed By Matt Lauer

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Good old Dina Lohan was interviewed by Matt Lauer this morning on the Today Show about her train wreck daughter Lindsay Lohan, and feels she was ambushed by Matt’s questions on Lindsay’s jail term, and her current stint in rehab. A friend of Dina’s tells Pop Eater that White Oprah was surprised by how many tough questions Matt asked.

“Dina felt ambushed by Matt. She was surprised how many tough questions he asked.”

“She didn’t understand why [Lauer] kept asking her those other questions — she knows she’s a great mother and Lindsay will get out of rehab soon. Everyone makes mistakes, it’s just that Lindsay makes it into the papers.”

She probably felt ambushed because she really doesn’t have a clue what is going on with her daughter. All Dina did through most of the interview was declare Judge Marsha Revel mishandled the case, and played hardball with Lindsay. Not to mention how many times she said the judge had been ‘recused’ from the case. She did everything in her power to blame everyone else for Lindsay’s problems rather than put any blame on Lindsay herself.

Lindsay Lohan bloated face

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Dina Lohan: Lindsay Made Friends With Murderers in Jail, Will Be Out of Rehab “Soon”

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Dina Lohan went on Today this morning to discuss Lindsay’s time in prison and her chances of being releases from rehab early.

In the interview, Dina blamed the judge for Linds’ lock-up and claims her daughter buddied up with a lot of “alleged murders” while she was in the clink. Seems weird that a famous young woman who only ended up serving two weeks would be locked up next to murderers, but I can’t imagine that a member of the Lohan family would lie to us.

The Mom of the Year candidate also says that Lindsay will not serve the full 90 days in rehab that she was sentenced to. You’d think she’d be an expert on the legal system after raising Lindsay for 24 years, but it sounds like Dina is dreaming on this one. TMZ consulted inside sources and legal experts who apparently told them that an early release for Lindsay is “very unlikely.”

Dina Lohan holding

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Lindsay Lohan Leaves Her Assistant to be Tortured by Dina and Ali

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Despite going straight from jail to serving 90 days in rehab, Lindsay Lohan keeps finding new and interesting ways to eff-up the outside world.

Lindsay’s not allowed to see friends while she’s locked-up “recovering,” so naturally she’s been getting regular visits from mom Dina and little sis Ali. TMZ reports that those two are still riding the Lindsay gravy train while she’s in the ‘hab, abusing Linz’s long-suffering assistant, Eleonore.

Ali & Lindsay In Paris Photo

“Sources close to Eleonore tell TMZ she is ‘miserable,’ ‘super-stressed’ and ‘incredibly worn-out’ these days – which is strange because Lindsay has been ‘away’ for nearly a month.’ But now she has to do Dina and Ali’s bidding. We’re told Dina ‘goes on for about nothing for days,’ constantly rambling about potential business deals.”

I guess I feel bad for this chick, but when you’re Lindsay Lohan’s assistant, you have to realize your life is going to suck all the time, forever. She probably thought she would just chill at home and throw darts at a picture of Lindsay for a few months, instead she’s got Dina and Ali riding her like a rented mule. At least she gets a break from running all over LA at 3 a.m. in search of cheap blow and freckle-covering foundation.

I think it’s hilarious that Eleonore rocks one name, diva-style, like she’s freakin’ Madonna, or something. Only in Hollywood can you become famous by being the assistant of a chick who really shouldn’t be famous.

 

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Lindsay Lohan: The Next Celebrity Apprentice?

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Lindsay Lohan may get to add reality TV star to her resume if she decides to do ‘Celebrity Apprentice’. According to Page Six and momma Dina Lohan, Trump is definitely interested in having Lindsay on the show, and there’s a chance she may do it! When I say ‘chance,’ I mean she may say yes now, and totally back out at the last minute.

“Donald is a friend of the family, and producers of ‘Celebrity Apprentice’ have approached Lindsay to appear in the next season. She’s deciding if she wants to do it or not, but she currently has three films in production, so she’s very busy.”

Lindsay Lohan Looking Old

Busy doing what? Going to parties and falling in cactus, or getting her lips plumped? Dina also has Lindsay’s back when it comes to that pesky SCRAM bracelet that detected a small amount of alcohol in on Lindsay Sunday night.
“She was at the MTV Awards and somebody spilled a drink on her leg, which must have set off the SCRAM bracelet. She has done absolutely nothing wrong and shouldn’t have to wear the bracelet in the first place. She is doing absolutely fine.”
Blah, blah, blah. Dina Lohan would stick up for Lindsay if she was photographed chugging a bottle of vodka and snorting coke off a stripper’s *ss. I’m holding on to this tiny glimpse of hope that Lindsay will do Celebrity Apprentice, but I know she’s going to leave me high and dry.
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